if I’m half and half can I be whole?

I’m half introvert and half extrovert. It confuses people all the time, sometimes even myself.

I love talking even if I know no one is listening.

But at the same time I despise public speaking. Everything about it. The way I feel before presenting with my stomach in knots and the way I feel throughout it. I get stiff, my mouth grows dry, and I studder.

I’m the type of person who when asked to introduce themselves to a class has thought through what they would say a hundred times only because of the fear of messing up.

Although at the same time, I dance in ballets and perform in musicals on stage in front of hundreds of people and I all I feel is at home.

I love parties and yet I still feel just as comfy in my bed where I sit and write in isolation.

I really don't care what people think but I also find myself struggling to get their thoughts out of my head.

I love being myself but sometimes all I wish I could be was someone else.