Welcome.

I don't know how I knew I was dead, but somehow, I just...knew. Without the weight of my body holding me down, being left only with the weight of thoughts, I felt... light. Extremely light. I was light to the point, where I was positive, that if I would jump up- I wouldn't be coming down. I wasn't happy. I knew, this lightness... it meant that I would never see anyone I'd loved, again. I was in a completely dark room, that's all I knew. I had just awaken from what felt like a deep, dark slumber, and as I pushed myself to a sitting position, I realized I'd arrived in a coffin-like contraption. The moment I sat up, I began crying. I didn't know how time will go on, without my loved ones. I didn't know how I'd cope.

It Took around 15 minutes of crying before my guide arrived, and I stopped. She appeared out of thin air. When she came,part of the room suddenly lit around her- she had an aura of sorts- a glow. Accept for that, she looked completely human. She had large brown eyes, straight brown hair, and wore a wide , ivory ballgown, making her look completely magical. Right next to her, was a large, illuminated arch, which looked a lot like a wedding arch, or a gate to some fairytale forest. For the first time, there was enough light for me to see Myself. I looked to where my legs would be- and saw nothing. Quickly, I looked to where my hand would be- and saw nothing. If my guide wouldn't have stopped me, I would have begun crying- again. But just as I wanted to, she smiled, sadly, and began talking: "hello! Welcome. Welcome to heaven". "H....heaven?" I asked, being quite confused. I didn't think I belonged in heaven. But why would I question it?

My guide sighed. "yes, everyone is confused at first. But don't worry, it will become clear eventually". Suddenly, she became uncomfortable: "but before that can happen, I need you to do something for me". "What's that?" I said, worryingly. I was hoping nothing extreme would be done.

It took a few moments for my guide to organize her thoughts, trying to explain gently: "the republic of heaven has decided, that in order to avoid...sadness, or depression, anyone who enters must let go of any memory they had when they were alive. Don't worry! You will remain yourself, you'll have you're personality, but all of your memories will be...gone. It will be easier that way, I promise". I was completely shocked, and, quite lost. But than I remembered- I was dead. I Would never be able to see anyone of these loved ones again. Still, I dared to ask: " what happens... if I refuse to stop remembering?". Again, the guide sighed: "If you don't consent to the ritual , it won't work. And if it dosen't work, you will have to stay.....here". she paused.

I felt the weight of the decision. I knew, I couldn't decide right away. "very well, my dear", the guide said to me, softly. " take your time, and tell me when you're ready. I'll wait right here.". The guide sat on the pure darkness, her aura revealing a lush bed of grass. It took me four days of crying, Four days before I was ready to stop remembering. When I told her, she smiled happily, as she told me that all I needed to do was go through the gate. I remember my perseverance before entering, my mixed emotions. All I can remember from the ritual, is my saddened self, trying to hold on to at least, one memory. I guess out of all of them, this was the one I was given. Everything else is nothing more than a feeling , a "knowing", that something belongs there. That guide was right. Since the day I've passed, I've been happy.

But sometimes, I wished I knew, what those memories were. Who I left behind, and why? Every night, I think about those people, and wonder- if they think of me.