Until It’s Too Late

Why are you trying to save me?

Don’t you know that a caged bird will never feel free?

The darkness is my brother,

The flame is my friend.

I’m ready to run into the flames,

Let my flesh feed them, help them to spread.

The smoke has filled my lungs,

I can’t even breathe.

Why should I fight the battle to keep breathing,

When I could let with the darkness embrace me?

Let it hold me,

Protect my eyes from the sun,

Stop my ears bleeding from your insults and taunts.

Swallow my words of spite and self-pity,

Let it take away my suffering.

May I find peace,

Away from the pain of breathing,

The burden of my smile.

Sat in a crowd pretending to be happy.

I can't keep pretending,

Acting as though it doesn't hurt.

Depressions more than just a bad day,

I can't change the years of neglect, pain and suffering.

I can’t change… and I don't want to.

I want to be the girl everybody was fond of,

But they never really knew.

If they knew they would have helped her,

Or so they would like to think.

You can't help me,

I don't want you to even try.

Just carry on ignoring me,

Pretending that I don't even exist.

And I will just sit amongst you,

Pretending everything is just swell.

Until it's too late.