Heartsick

I don’t understand.

I don’t understand why others can’t love me as freely and as unconditionally as I love.

Why can’t people just love without judgement? It’s not so hard really.

All you have to do is let yourself love and let all the other stuff go.

See? Easy.

I’m heartbroken because I loved and all its gotten me is heartache.

You can be nice and kind but it doesn’t matter because no one really cares.

Never marry someone for your kids sake. Just to give them a good father and family life. It will backfire on you in the end, he doesn’t really love you , you don’t really love him, but you are close friends cohabitating in the same house. He spends all his waking hours at work leaving you at home alone. Kids are grown now out on thier own. Nothing left but to sit and grow old in a chair

and wait to die. I’m waiting.