Trapped

The voice in my head which sometimes feels dormant rises.

Slowly.

Softly.

Gently.

It whispers like a soft breeze, sometimes I can’t hear it.

The murmur is so soft and yet as it grows stronger in the blink of an eye it roars.

Screaming.

Crying.

Panicking.

It rattles my brain.

It drives me insane.

I feel as though I grow mad and I feel trapped.

I am trapped inside my head.

I live controlled by fears and anxiety.

Of what? I don’t know.

What I do know is I want to run.

I want to free myself of these chains.

I want to break free from my head and live life like you.

You who have silence,

You that doesn’t panic.

You that I don’t know yet but each day I challenge.

You the side of me that is hidden.

The one that fights my anxiety.

The more I strike the stornger it gets.

Though my sword is sharp,

Anxiety’s shield is stronger.

So I must strike and strike again until that armor breaks.

I must fight and run and scream.

I must scream until my real voice is heard.

The one without fears.

The one who is stronger.

Everyday I struggle but every day that I fall and get back up I win a small battle.

Are there days when you beat me?

Are there days when you leave me in shreds?

The answer is yes.

But I cannot give up.

I cannot let you win.

A small battle won is not all there is.

We’ll clash and clash again but the war is the one that I will win.