Never the Same, Please

I can't be the only one who wanted things to go back to normal, but when I think about 'normal' I get even more depressed. My job didn't change much, I am supposedly an "essential worker." When this all happened in March, the only thing that changed was how far my job suspended worker's rights for the sake of their customers. Don't misunderstand, being a grocer worker allows people to be able to get food and other necessities so I understood. But they didn't stop asking from us, and are still asking a whole lot more from a whole lot less, and the more lawsuits against them, the worse the situation becomes. It got me thinking; grocerers aren't the only job that does this.

Warehouses, retailers, pharmacy-you name it, they do it, but how many people are out of a job? I hope I don't sound angry, but I am exasperated. What will it take for real change?

We could say education. We could say fair policy. We could say accountability. These also got me thinking.

It has to be everything. Everything needs to change. Everything needs to be 'reset' so to speak. But I don't want violence or complacency to be the solution either.

It made me realize that truly the change begins with me, but me alone can't change a damn thing.

It has to be everyone.

I had to ask myself the question; Why should I care?

I came to the answer; Because no one does!

It just has to be one thing. I've seen that do amazing things. Just changing one thing for the better in my life encouraged others to do the same. For one thing, just being quiet for ten minutes changed my life. It lead me to prayer; reaching out for something better than our imperfect solutions, our imperfect -isms.

Talking doesn't seem to be solving anything. In America, we've seen the so called "debates." Listening is considered weak. But have we really listened? Listen to silence. It does more than you can imagine.

We all want something better, but I think we've all been thinking and talking too much, working or watching too much. If we truly see another human being and simply contemplate their existence, wouldn't we come to the conclusion that they have a life so very similar to our own? I'm not talking about material wealth or anything like that. I'm talking about everyday frustrations, but also everyday joys. Does this person think about her family? Does this person worry about his job? Are they like me? Do they have problems? Most of these answers are yes.

Sometimes I'll see someone, and it will just occur to me when I overhear a tidbit of information from a conversation they'll have on the phone; Wow, this person has a whirlwind of a life, just like me. This person has a mother or father or brother or sister or son or daughter or so-and-so. This person has a mind that thinks, a mind that feels, a heart that beats. Gosh this sounds like me.

Maybe this person is better off than I am, or perhaps worse, I don't know. What I do know is that despite what economic or social background they come from, their relationships, their wants, their needs are not so different from mine. I think we've forgotten that. I thought with the Covid-19 pandemic, perhaps we'd realize that. And for a brief period of time, I saw that goodness come out of people.

But now it's back to the same thing, this time we're just wearing masks that better hide cursing one another from afar.

We're not people anymore. We're back into the machine, this time with vigor. And it's driving me crazy.

I'm a person. So are you. Is that so hard to understand? When we are caught up in our own little world, yes, yes it is.

Please, listen to silence, and instead of thinking of yourself, think of someone else; not so you can feel guilty, but so you can feel free.

Set yourself free from this machine, and never be the same, please.