The Architects Chapter Five: Practice Makes Perfect

His office is so... normal. If it weren't for all the psychotic craziness of my current situation, I'd feel like I have a legitimate job.

But... none of this is normal, and everything is weird, so I'm freaking the fuck out.

"So," I say. "How do we build stuff?"

"Oh, just think about what you want and it shows up."

Oh shit. If I have to mind-summon something, won't that mean I can't? Since I'm not actually Mr. Kerpetski, can I still do it?

I have to try.

Alexei is studying me with his cold black eyes.

I have to try.

I envision a pile of white legos. Hey, start simple, right?

I close my eyes, praying that this will work. If I mess this up... what will happen to me? What will happen to me?

A fate worse than death.

Why do I have to keep dwelling on those words?

I don't want to know what's worse than death. I don't want to die. I have to get back to Amanda. I have to save her.

I have to get away from this creepy god.

I open my eyes.

"It worked."

"Well, of course it worked, Mr. Kerpetski. Do you think I would lie to you?

"I... uh, no, of course not. You haven't lied to me at all since coming here. I guess it's all just.. a lot."

"Yes. Mr. Kerpetski. I totally understand. When I first came here, I was the same way. When you first came here, it took you weeks to master everything."

Only weeks? Wow. Mr. Kerpetski must be some kind of prodigy.

"So... I can summon legos with my mind?"

"You can summon anything with your mind. Well, pieces of anything. Assembly required."

So... if I ask for a giant time machine that looks like a regular 21st century building, all I have to do is build it and I'm good?

"Of course, you can't summon whole buildings at once. That defeats the purpose of our organization."

Well shit. It's like this guy can read my mind.

Holy shitbuckets, can he read my mind? He's a god, after all. Can he read my mind? Does he know I'm a fraud?

STOPPPPPPPP THINKINGGGGGGGGGG.

It's like when someone tells you to not think about pink fluffy unicorns and suddenly all you can think about is pink fluffy unicorns.

Alexei is giving me a weird look, but no weirder than usual. I guess that means he can't read my mind. Whew. Thank God.... gods... for that.

I wish more than anything that this was a dream. But, unlike Amanda, I don't have weird dreams. My dreams usually consist of nightmares about getting fired from my McDonald's job and not being able to pay my share of our rent.

Or there was that one nightmare about Amanda being shot in an alleyway, but that's about as weird as it gets.

This is no dream.

This is real.

And right now, I have to build something random out of these white legos. Something that will eventually end up in the real world, in marble or stone instead of plastic.

Damn, that's so freaky.

I take a sip of my "blood slushi." It makes me wish mortal workplaces had slushies instead of coffee. I'm not a huge fan of drip coffee. Amanda is addicted to the stuff, but I would much rather have complimentary slushies, a.k.a. sugar bombs.

Although I suppose slushies are cold, so they wouldn't be great in the summer.

Although this place is so weird that I wouldn't be surprised if they found a way to make slushies into a hot drink.

Maybe they eliminate the ice and just heat up a cup of syrup.

That sounds both sickening and delicious.

I take another sip of the slushie.

I have to commend these people. There are the cheap shitty slushies with too little syrup, and there's the build-your-own slushies that inevitably end up with too much syrup, but these slushies are actually good.

The one good thing about this totally wack place is their slushies.

Wow. This is so fucking trippy. I'm drinking slushies in the future, surrounded by gods and trying to build a time machine so I can get back to my century. Hello, George Lucas is calling, he wants to turn your life into a movie.

Although I guess in the future, George Lucas is dead. I wonder who his sci-fi successor will be?

Probably no one. I'm pretty sure Star Wars will still be just as awesome in the future as it is in the present.

Maybe they'd make a remake of it. Oh Jesus, the horror. How can one possibly make a remake of a classic? I can understand remaking animated things into live action (except Lion King, that one just made no sense) but remaking live action into more live action? Just weird.

I can understand continuing the series, but remaking it altogether? Ew.

Funny. I'm in the middle of a nutcase world and all I can think about is Star Wars. Typical me.

I think about Amanda's measley stash of legos, all the things I wanted to build but couldn't. Here, I don't have to worry about running out of pieces.

Maybe this could be fun, after all.

As long as I stay focused on what really matters.

Getting home.

I'll finish this project, and then start working on the big stuff. After all, to start out with something complex would be suspicious.

I have to be careful. Cautious.

And that means building some boring shit before I embark on a master build.

Practice makes perfect, right?

I just need to hurry up with the practice. After all, I don't have much time.