limits

ain’t no words of hope

even though i’m full of words of hope

i hear them

but i don’t feel them

i believe them

but i don’t feel them

. . . and i feel small today

empty and unconnected

i’m in a small sector

of a sea of people,

just like me

with wants, wishes,

desires and dreams,

the overwhelming majority of them

unfulfilled

hopelessly,

vast improbability

of any chance of,

fulfillment

opportunities everywhere,

with no chance of attainment

like a bird with wings

in a cage

vast far boundaries with no limits,

in the horizon

in the wind,

inconcievably unconcieved

like a man with rich imagination

whose dreams are perennially shattered

by ongoing nightmares

whose eyes have seen majestic mountains

in the distance divine

but once in a tattered lifetime,

whose eyes now only see but barbed streaks

across the prison sky

endless time,

no ends,

but for us,

each moment whispers,

the end could come

at any moment

it will come,

at any moment

while wondering

led by the din of noise

of polluted political air,

whether what waits on the other side

will be insecurity again

it does

this end

it waits

and it will arrive

whether small or large

strong or weak

still,

or agitated,

angry or frustrated

it will

for all

like losing consciousness at the end of sleep

like a coma with no waking

aware and out

awake then out

awake then gone

matter changes over millenia,

we are spirit and flesh

we do not change

we die and flesh decomposes

we live in mystery

flesh and mind,

living for fulfillment

knowing the end

as it waits unexpectedly,

helplessly,

is a torment

is expected

and somehow we live,

each breath automatic

despite the weakness

living to the fullest is impossible

there’s never satisfaction long lasting

but fragmented into bits of pleasure

if at all,

mixed with pain

faint words of hope and faith linger as wisps

on the fringes of my thought

they calm somewhat,

but eternal peace is fleeting,

agonizingly temporal,

while the clash of memory

the harsh realness of what history reveals,

the documentation of sordid events

like solid steel,

stands hard and stark against these thoughts

that we all live but a brief time

mingled with the phantoms who’ve worked evil

who’ve caused untold pain to the innocent

for wealth

and human sacrifice

oh, if only peace would last

if only life offered real comfort

if only quiet,

sky

land

sea

and air

if only sunlight

would shine unobstrusive

untainted

if only sunlight would remain

if only the cancerous taint of evil

would forever be obliterated