12bpm

twelve beats per minute

as God hums in me

underneath where my heart’s

supposed to be

aching throb

then below

where emptiness

lies, flies stick to an ointment

i never wanted

the things i saw to happen

something else did

not me

still, rainbows

of eggshell whites

to unstarred nights

tear an arc over my skies

the trajectories of things

I don’t want to carry

lobbed over distant hills

across vacant seas

w̶h̶i̶s̶t̶l̶i̶n̶g̶ h̶o̶w̶l̶i̶n̶g̶ wailing at me

they’re still there

even when the sun shines

even when light peeks inbetween

before the blue sheet turns tinfoil

and gives me respite in the rain,

camo over their songs

till my ears flush red again