Loneliness
I’m never alone .
Be it demons in my head ,
Monsters under my bed ,
They always accompany me ,
asleep or awake .
I named one of them ” Ensan ”
Another ” Bethani ”
One ” Sakeih ”
Ah...I forgot the twins...
” LinMei & LunMai ”
That one hasn’t visited me in awhile...
I wonder where they went .
Am I crazy?
.
no...
I feel most alone when they are not there .
See , they were my friends ,
before I knew what the word meant .
How odd .
.
right ?
Rather than the warmth ,
of a normal human hand ,
I felt more comfort ,
more at ease ,
with a hand I could never touch ,
only see .
Maybe it’s because they never talked ,
just like me . . .
Their eyes ,
always had such a sad , angry shine to them .
They felt outcasted ,
decieved .
Maybe they needed a friend ,
just like me . . .
Their hands were always so cold ,
but ,
strangely enough ,
they emmitted warmth .
A cold warmth .
Maybe they needed a hand to hold ,
just like me . . .
They were always beside me ,
behind me ,
on top of me .
Sometimes , they were me .
Maybe they were lonely ,
just like me. . .
Sadly ,
they left me .
One by one .
back when I was seven .
Ensan was the last to leave .
(Please...)
.
hi
Looking back now ,
I realise why they left .
I was slowly being surrounded ,
with more and more humans ,
all of similar age .
(Who are.. .you?)
.
hi
I guess they thought I didn’t need them anymore .
.
.
.
I guess I thought I didn’t need them anymore .
First it became seconds ,
when I couldn’t see them .
Then it became minutes .
Then hours .
Turned to months .
And finally years .
It came to a point where I thought ,
when I actually thought
they weren’t real anymore .
Honestly ,
real to you ,
it may never seem .
But real to me ,
shall they always be .
The emotions they conveyed ,
not through words ,
but by actions alone .
(.. .hello?)
hi
You could see their words .
friends ?
You could taste them at times .
Metallic.
Ensan
Bethani
Sakeih
LinMei
LunMai
The clock striked nine
Ensan
Bethani
Sakeih
LinMei
LunMai
We are your disguise
Ensan
Bethani
Sakeih
LinMei
LunMai
Do you want to die
Ensan
Bethani
Sakeih
LinMei
LunMai
Spread your wings and fly
Ensan
Bethani
Sakeih
LinMei
LunMai
Ensan
Bethani
Sakeih
LinMei
LunMai
Ensan
Bethani
Sakeih
LinMei
LunMai
.
.
.
.
.
.
Join me in my mind?
( .. .hi.. . )