Prostitution for Dummies -or- How I Can’t Even Sell Myself Correctly

Once

upon

a

time

I tried to

sell

myself

for

money

and by this

I mean

get

paid

for

sex

my

14

th

lover

was

an

old

man

I

was

so

disgusted

when he

said

I can’t

believe

I’m ready

to

go

again

and I laid

there

or

maybe

I

straddled

him

honestly

I don’t

remember

got all

those

tests

after

like I dodged

a

bullet

cause I felt

shot

through

the heart

if your vagina

leads

to your

love

like a fatally

eclipsed

ring

finger

hey,

I got one of those.

too.

just a body

going

through

the motions

I didn’t

even

have

the

energy

to

fake

payment

I lied about this

for the

longest

time

longer

than

a climax

but not

long

enough

for

shame

name of the game?

He was a renowned

doctor

here to give a speech

married

three kids

and I was the

vessel

he poured

his own

insecurities

into.

I ran.

I ran so fast the

chef

of the same

hotel

said

didn’t I just see you?

and he woo

d

me

bought me

black and milds

and I think I

fucked

him

too

#13

count it

though I don’t

remember

he fed me

sushi

too scared to

admit

I’d rather die

than eat

fish

but

so scared

I had no voice

left

except the

whine

except the

dine

and

I did not take

the money

laid out

on the

table

thank you

for your

services

could have paid for

all

those

tests

to tell me

that even as I ruined

myself

I was

at

least

still

pure

as

the

driven

snow

as

pure

as I’ve

ever

known

the next man

I fuck

is

#

17

I don’t count the ladies

like we don’t count

the baby

daddy

s

once I said

I’d

keep it to ten

then I fucked

your

best

friend

and now I don’t know

should I stay

should I

go

wear that

scarlet

letter

and it would make more sense

if I had taken those

cents

but even whores

know

they

know

better