Notes App Message #1: 17 Seconds Away

It is unnecessary to send this to you because it’s enough to know my intentions. I won’t send this, but know I mean every word with all that I am.

Let our memories of each other be enough to convince us that this distance is good, because it is. Every single second I spent with you has never fallen short of perfect. I will believe in myself more, live my life for me while you live your life for you, and if we are in the future, you will be welcomed by a me who is better suited for you— for friendship or more.

There are things I want to say, but I will say at least this for now.

17 seconds or thousands of miles away.

I understand unless I don’t. Though… surely, I will see you around.

If it’s meant to be, we’ll cross paths again. I pray to God, let it be a time we’re ready and more willing. If not, the respect and love I have will always be there in the space made especially made for you. It’s been something more than beautiful: the experience of sharing time together.

All I gave, I gave freely. You owe me nothing. But I owe you this: I’m so sorry.

From my heart and whole being to you, [name], [inside joke nickname], [actual nickname], future small claims judge, future owner of a bookstore-marijuana-dispensary-hole-in-the-wall-pizza-place, certified Mt. Cleverest climber (with your awful puns, but mine were always worse), wonderful and terrible human being, my dear, my friend, my dear friend, thank you.

Thank you for everything.