peach-flavoured dissociation / wednesday, 9:58pm

i’m in the mood to disappear

i tried, before

chewed tapioca pearls so they wouldn’t expect me to speak

they didn’t anyway, of course

i only got a stomachache

and a taste of modern friendship

like a mouthful of seawater

i could write a list--

carve it into the flesh of my forearm--

of all the places

i'd rather be

than here

me and my headphones

we'll have a grand old time,

they'll see

i don't think i was made

for this friend thing

or maybe that's the narcissism talking

all i know is the familiarity of my four walls

tattooed with pieces of poems

that make me feel something, anything

can i go back to being alone now?