DO NOT TAKE ORALLY

Many women, about me, do concur:

Serious gastric disturbances will occur.

The ones who persevere destinal, say dross

From me gives intestinal chaos...

...stuck in their gut.

Proton pump inhibitors

Allow all my paramours,

Relaxation and peristalsis

Until they realize that's all there is...

...stuck in a rut.

Epiphany comes after the fact

Ipso facto in the GI tract

When bilious regret sees greener hills

Beyond premature fluorescing spills...

...obstruct it shut.

Rolaids, Tums best all latex

In pursuit of safe, eupeptic sex;

When placing protection 'round points of contact,

Adults take two, twice a day, exact...

...and nothing but.

Fetished, recreational substitutes

Not lost on vocational prostitutes

Who know how to buffer their gastric mucosa

From tantric acidophilic ambrosia...

...somewhat.

Sometimes I pine for the good ol' days

When the only act was the good ol' way.

The catalog of ways and clever creations

That that do not result in procreation

...so cover your butt.