so red it’s almost black

forbidden and longing, broken wishes by which she dreams, her thoughts caressing the sky as she waits for him by the sycamore tree. he looks past her as always, asking about her day, her friend (his ex), and they briefly discuss his new girl. he doesn’t notice the look that crosses her face as the conversation twists between the weather, love, and goodbyes. she wishes that he would just take the time to see her, really see her, but as usual, he’s gone before she even has the chance to say everything that she wishes she could. he thinks he’s happy, but he’s still searching, much like her. he doesn’t deserve her and she doesn’t deserve this ignorance, this blind friendship. they both deserve more. but not each other. never each other. and yet she dares to dream. dares to talk about him, dares to think about him, dares to love him, even as she knows that her wildest dreams can never do this reality justice. even as she knows that she has never been one to stand by and watch. but this is out of her hands now. and she must come to terms with that, however cold and sharp it may be.