outside stillness, galaxies exploding within

I write myself into a ball of messy things

neurons entangled into static

electric things

lightning-bolt in a jar,

machinery trapped in a circulating mind

c o n s t a n t l y beating

moving

processing,

nylon threads between soft tissue

acrylic thoughts

spread against spiraling notions

on repeat, they play

on repeat, they breathe

in these heavy bones of mine,

casting a net between hopeless ribs

ivory build,

and tainted rust

take a needle

and construct breaths from a woolen yarn

two strokes up

and three pulls down,

spider's web sewn into lungs

eyelashes covered in silver silk,

fingertips sticking

with the overused patterns of breathing

beauty, chaos

destruction and rebuild

all connected into one

inhaling stardust

and spitting out moss,

trying to balance out the universe's arms

building me into something

I have yet to become

continuously counting

ancient bees

their buzzing

their whispers

until sleep finds me, soothing my winter lungs

and the summer heart,

making it easier to inhale the stardust

and exhale moss

it's always so l o u d in here

in this head

in this chest

even when so perfectly still

___