Wondering

Why do these feelings emerge when I am stressed and seemingly alone here.  Almost as though a blanket of hopelessness has enclosed and ensnared my body.  These limbs refuse to move as I stare at the blank wall of this room.  Thoughts of today constantly running through my mind with too many what ifs, what could haves, should haves.  She doesn't help with the problem at hand, the intruder, the outsider.  "My my, so the witless fool does think.  I was starting to wonder if this was a trait of your people, or just you."  I can only take a deep breath through clenched teeth.  Even here in this sanctuary, I am not alone.