I'm going to kill myself.

I'm not going to slit my wrists.

I won't chase 50 pills with a bottle of booze.

I'm not going to swallow a bullet.

I'm not going to hang myself.

I don't know how it'll happen.

I don't know when the time will come.

This is not a cry for help.

This is a fact I'm certain of.

I'll act out recklessly

I'll push against every boundary I find

I'll treat myself the way I deserve

A useless, old whore who knows her worth

I'll ingest every drug I can get my hands on

I'll relish the numb even more than the high

Maybe one night, I'll accidentally OD

I'll put myself in dangerous situations

I'll meet strangers in motel rooms

I'll wander the streets all night long

I'll walk slowly past perilous places

I'll make sure to look vulnerable

I'll never lock a window or door again

My arched throat is an open invitation

To strangling hands, to hungry blades

I'm already dead inside,

But I'm too scared to finish the job

Too cowardly to end my own miserable life

I'm putting the challenge out there

And we all know, I'm a sure thing

It's gonna happen, sooner or later

My white knight disguised as Death

Death, the lover I've been longing for

I'm here, my love, I've been expecting you

Love me,

Deliver me,

Show me mercy,

Kill me. Kill me. Kill me.