Perceiving Me

My memories are clouded with grey

Clearly vivid on every lousy day

Not once while young did I believe

Any love I could achieve

Disappointment in my mothers eyes

Praise became my father's lies

My sisters sang behind my back

Every flaw or character I could lack

Toxic beings love company

Eagerness is what would come from me

I tried to please, hoping for ease

Nothing... nothing... came from these

I let myself out, but not far away

Found myself a place to stay

I made a friend wise and true

That clapped and cheered what I could do

My love had grown with a shiny spine

I made choices solely mine

One drop of sunshine is all it took

For me to give me a second look

I grew to see past grayscale demise

Found trust in what took to my eyes

Distance and fonder

It helped me grow stronger

Learning to say no

Daring not to even go

Choosing myself when I was in need

Accepting to deny an often good deed

I put myself first, though struggling with guilt

Until I saw what strength was built

Peace overcame me when I saw

The hatred for me had been me, most of all