The Circle of Strife

Oh, we the prosperous and arrogant Baby Boomers are the progeny of the Greatest Generation. In our arrogance we take credit for the civil rights movement, ending the war in Vietnam, the sexual revolution, and FOX "News." Of all the things we take credit for, the one small thing we should take credit for, but don't are Millennials. This younger generation has become our generation's greatest whipping boy. Everything these pierced, tattooed, gender nonconforming, technology addicted, and Global Warming fear mongers do makes our Preparation-H infused Depends steam! Millennials disrespect the socio-economic statis quo we've worked so hard to disguise as a fair and just society. Those darn student debt burdened youngsters constantly disrespect our hard work by ripping apart the thin illusionary state of equality we've created revealing the ugly, but very real social inequality that lies beneath the surface. They question how we can pursue the American Dream in our big homes and plush beds when there are those who don't have beds at all.

We the Millennials have somehow inherited the fuck ups of our grandparents. We've been left with a world that can only be described as a trainwreck in front of a failing nuclear reactor on top of an earthquake. The Boomers have messed things up so bad, instead of Millennials, we should be called th,e K-Y Generation because we're well and truly dry fucked. Due to inheriting a failing world, we should have been prescribed Xanax at birth. We're not the snowflakes Boomers have labelled us. Face it Boomers have handed us a shit show and given us only a spoon to dig our way out. Boomers can take credit for whatever they like, but racism, discrimination, war, and the sexual revolution still remain. So we argue Boomers have been mislabeled as well. If a name should speak only truther, Boomers should actually be called the, Almosts. They almost ended discrimination, they almost proved peace was better than war, and they almost won the sexual revolution (which has become a war of attrition). The Almosts were so spoiled by the prosperity of their parents that they started fights, but figured they'd done enough when the bong water dried and everyone realized that patchouli oil smells like ass. So, they cut their hair, finished college, and instead of fighting the Man, they replaced the Man. Anti-war activists would become insanely wealthy by investing in the military industrial complex and label themselves Reagan Democrats. Apparently war just swell if it lined your pockets and there was zero chance of being drafted. That classic Who song was right. The new boss is the same as the old boss. Of course, they kept the delusion that they were rebels by continuing to attend Grateful Dead concerts. Of course in the name of nostalgia, these concerts reek of patchouli oil. The only real difference is instead of scoring weed, the concert goers score cheap, smuggled Canadian Viagra. The vibe is still the same and the music still SUCKS.

We the Gen Xer's...Fuck, what were we talking about again?