Lazy, Good-for-Nothing Spouses Beat Narc Spouses Any Old Day and Twice on Sunday

A thing that lucky people don’t get, and can’t get, because it’s just too alien-bizarro in how it happens, but being married to a real, “personality-disordered” narcissist is not like having a lazy, do-nothing spouse who never helps you out. A lazy, do-nothing spouse is an absolute wondrous blessing from above compared to a truly narcissistic spouse.

For the narcissistic spouse not only does nothing to help you out, but he or she actively, covertly, diabolically, sneakily, furtively, constantly is working against you, undermining you without telling you, relentlessly sabotaging your hard work “for the family“ and smiling and cajoling and flattering you all the while.

It makes no sense. For in the end it sinks the narcissist’s own ship, too—though not with you: You will have sunk before them; the narcissist will inevitably sink two or three or ten codependent suckers later after they abused and discarded you. Or, in my case, if you reproduced with the demon, discarded them to save your life, but are still tied to the narcissist’s sinking, abusive garbage-skow-disguised-as-a-yacht via the children.

But a narcissist doesn’t think about the future. Like everything else, they only pretend to do so and make a big, impressive-sounding show of it.

The narcissist only thinks of the next hit of narcissistic supply. Adoration-from-strangers supply, abuse-and-control-of-family supply, and that’s it. Literally. That is literally it. But they are so good at posing as normal, or even ”such a good person.”