Is this how it’s supposed to feel?

I am stubborn in my love for you.

Pig-headed in my adoration for you through and through.

It's too early to queue my feelings.

Too early to inscribe our names on the sistine chapel cellings.

These days now, I crave the secret identity of us, the anonymity.

I've tried to look at you injudiciously.

But rose-colored glasses; to my eyes are glued.

Our heartbeats already sing in harmony.

Is this how love is supposed to feel?

Like my head is lost in the pink clouds of sobriety?

Like I am falling from the heavens luxuriating in the lack of air, in the crashing of my lungs?

In the sinking feeling of falling?

Is this how love is supposed to feel?

Is it not too early to call it love?

But isn't this all what it is symptomatic of?

If it isn't love I don't know what this is.

One day maybe I will see it was all a mistake.

I'll learn to accept the heartache.

But I've only kept thinking what if, mistake this is not.

And in five or ten years, what if I cannot recognize myself without you.

Perhaps this love doesn't die off.

Forever I would hate myself for ever doubting in you, in us.

If this ends in heartache I won't be angry.

Not blankly.

No matter how we end in five days or fifty-five years, my heart deserves some type of accolade.

Because you were the first to my heart evade.

The first to explore the trenches of my soul, in this strange love, crusade.

To search through worlds and places forbade.

I've always wondered who would be the first.

Who would see me, beyond my worst.

Despite my invisible being.

Now I have a name.

And I believe that nothing can ever be the same.

For that alone he should receive some sort of prize.

For love, he humanized.

If only for this very moment he has become my muse.

He awakened the butterflies.

One I believed my soul to devoid of.

Is this how love is supposed to feel?

Shaky legs and racing heart I falter on this balance-wheel.

I no longer own this mechanical beating in my chest.

You have come in the night and my heart you have burglarized.

All of this I can no longer protest.