happens to the best of us

His mind, a crucible

Forging truth in the fires of

dispassionate observation

unwavering willingness to experience

no dread, no fear, just a

wondering wandering mind

there was an agreement at the beginning

that nothing would hurt as bad

as the loneliness of this

perpetual moment

but along came Passion

and there, borne some desire for her

so there was set new movement

regarding nothing as highly

as the pleasure and excitement

that the body can feel

but through it all continuing collecting information

dichotomy and self-hatred

some comparison to perfection

and a growing burdensome addiction

the flames yet stoking themselves

even in moments alone,

a wild eyed search began to fill the self-dug hole

there was no treasure at the bottom, only mud,

and a soulless enjoyment became the norm

no memories were formed in this darkness

quiet, fitful sleep for years ensued

trapped in the bondage of her

seductive glances

absent from the body,

the mind in tact, hiding somewhere

and she toyed with him,

new growth in the garden of lust

dead flowers sprouting up and demanding to be watered

endlessly

and he still knew better

driving deeper and time goes on,

she has not changed in her beauty

though it is so much harder to find her

deals with the devil to keep her as close

as he could, chained him to her

and sweetly she ripped him apart,

stabbing uncontrollably

while passion and pleasure and TRUTH

battled in him

his shame destroyed his body from the inside out

and nothing created was worth the effort anymore

and so she handed him poison to drink

and it made him sleep even deeper

until once almost suddenly

while in a nightmare

a brightness burned and purged

somehow extending a hand

lovingly pulling him out through the

brambles and thorns

through layers of mud and regret

faster and farther, as he tried to resist

but the light cleanses without need for permission

because it despises her and loves him perfectly

still being pulled

he notices he's been lost here for as long as he lived

and still being pulled

this salvation, this gift

increases in its value

and she fades into the distance

(though those glances still attract,

she is beautiful afterall)

somehow his bleeding, dying body

is filled with new life

true life

light purging and death ending

life above all else

Thank God.