You’re Hungry? But I Wanna New iPhone!

I am going to state the obvious here. Our priorities have gone beyond a little off to a state of an ass backwards circle jerk of fuckery. What is worst, we have become masters at justifying why our collective narcissism has become normalized. There is no reason to reevaluate what we deem to be important as a species because we have our heads so far up our own asses we can't see anything except for that piece of gum we swallowed in the sixth grade that's still hanging out in our intestines. I am not completely immune to this discombobulation of priorities either. I want stuff. I want an easier life. I want to get a lot of likes for what I post on The Prose. I often have to remind myself that what I consider to be my serious first world problems would make people in the third world laugh hysterically. Well, they would laugh hysterically if they weren't weakened by malnutrition, suffering from dysentery, and slowly dying from a disease that could be cured by $5 worth of antibiotics if it was available to them. I could lament about the nearly infinite ways our priorities are upside down, but for the sake of time and due to my being raised by television shortened attention span I will just hit on the most important one, children.

It is easy to dismiss the plight of the world's children with statements like, "If you can't feed em don't breed em." It's easy to pass judgement and admonish those poor yet fertile people of the third world. After all, knowing how poor they are they should use birth control at all times to prevent conceiving another mouth to feed. Birth control's not available? Well, denying ones biological urges builds character. Essentially, we blame the parents for the hunger, disease, violence, and poverty they have no choice but to raise their children in. Makes sense. I guess as sperm missiles these pre-kiddos should have chosen to be ejaculated out of a CEO into a mom with a PhD. Oh wait, THEY CAN'T FUCKING CHOOSE! So when a kiddo is born to a poor farmer and his wife (who FYI had zero access to birth control) in the Sudan, I guess it's just the bad luck of the draw.

Those of us in the first world are too busy to help, but we can send thoughts and prayers along with a note saying, "Sorry, you will go without immunizations, basic medical care, adequate food, and deal with the very real possibility of being killed in yet another civil war. Tough break kid. I'd help, but my finances are a bit stretched because, I have to spend $1000 on the latest iPhone with slightly better camera, slightly worse battery, and features I will never use. but it's worth it because it now comes in sapphire blue! I also don't have time to volunteer at a rescue organization because I'm going to wait in line for hours at Best Buy for a chance to get the special release, 1 in every 100 iPhones that has one of Steve Jobs actual testicle hairs imbedded in the case. It's called the iPhone T series (I hope I get a curly one)! My current phone works fine, but come on! Didn't you hear me? Sapphire blue! Maybe next time, kid. Take care of that nasty cough and bloody stool. Maybe your parents should take you on the three day journey by foot to the nearest medical facility."

Oh, but we don't see this level of poverty in the USA! Really? The reality, 1 in 5 children in the US live day to day without adequate nutrition. As a teacher, my wife will tell you this number increases during the summer months because summer break means many kids don't get that free lunch which may be their only real meal of the day. Now Mr. Elon Musk once offered to donate 6 billion dollars to the World Food Program in its fight to stop world hunger. To this point, they haven't received a dime. Hey Elon, you Eddie Munster looking fuck-hole, put up or shut up! I guess Twitter was a better investment than human life. Hey Bezos! Why don't you divert some of the money you spend on making rockets that look like circumcised penises (overcompensating much?) and help out. You probably have more money in between the cushions of your couch than the GDP of most third world countries. Oh, and could you find delivery drivers who understand that some packages are fragile? A coked up gorilla shows more caution and common sense.

Have you ever wondered why Saint Jude's, Shriner's Hospitals. and other non-profit children's hospitals have to solicit donations? Simple, because here in the good old USA we expect parents to pay for their sick kids medical bills. In this case its, "If you can't afford the surgeries, chemo, hospital stay, and dozens of prescriptions a day, don't breed em."

Once again, with thoughts and prayers we can say, "Sorry kiddo that you're not getting the chemo you need. Here in the USA we don't do socialized medicine. It's just not Christian and I ain't no commie!"

Okay, so maybe you are against anything that seems socialist. How about thinking that kids are worth more than the slight pain of another deduction on your paycheck? Besides, if you are so against socialism then why are you driving on roads, enrolling your cum fruit in public schools, and enjoying the safety and wage regulated jobs socialists fought so hard for at the turn of the twentieth century? All these services you feel entitled to are basically socialist in nature. So, if you enjoy any of these socialist benefits you should paint yourself red and learn to like borscht comrade!

Oh, and for those of you who want to have children, good for you! As an adoptive parent might I make a suggestion? Once you have your mini-me's, consider adoption. Currently, there are almost 400,000 kiddos in the foster system in the US alone. Do some of them have issues? Duh, and these issues are almost always related to the treatment they get from the adults who're responsible for them! Besides, if you've read my rant to this point it shows that you have issues too (mostly questionable taste in reading material), but you don't have to be a picture of mental health. You just have to be willing to love someone who has had a trainwreck level of introductions to life. As human animals, we like to fuck, but our enthusiastic and frequent copulation has led to a world population of 7 billion people. Why not help a kiddo that is already here its already a bit fucking crowded? I can honestly say that in my total fucked up, probably should have been aborted life, adopting my son is one of the very few things I have done right.

In short, our priorities are fucked. We are too selfish to see the importance of protecting ALL children. Of course, there are those who devote their lives to helping children, but the needs are many and the hands are few. With the resources we have, caring for the world's children should be a top priority and first world countries could lead the way. However, investing in cooler ways to show the world the chicken fingers platter we had at Chili's for dinner and finding better and more efficient ways to kill each other is more important. If we can't get our priorities straight, I am afraid that this point in history will be seen by future generations as equally barbaric to the gladiator fights in ancient Rome, the Spanish Inquisition, and the disco era.