How Can it Be

How can it be? My life is a ticking time bomb and I cannot stop it. The pain is constant and the worries in my mind overflow until I cry. How can I have hope when the end of the line is near? The only option out of this is a peaceful death in my sleep, except it won't be peaceful. How can the only escape from this life is death? I want to feel better, my body is old and fragile, they say they can't fix it, my only cure is the sweet release of death. How can it be?