Story 8

Tatsuya was sitting with their friend, Mr.Gorgeous the Gif Emperor of JPEGlandia. The two were talking, exchanging stories and laughter and food.

“I have had years of training in both!” The two laughed as Mr.Gorgeous finished his story. Tatsuya opened their mouths to say something but decided against it.

“Well, go on. Say what you were going to say.” he gently poked his friend

“Ah, I was going to say something funny but it wasn't really.” Tatsuya shook their head

“That's fine, most of what I say isn't funny. Say it!”

“No thank you.”

Mr.Gorgeous stood up and turned to his friend “*whispers* Well then, there is only one solution…”

“*whispers* Yeah?” Tatsuya stood up, smiling at their friend’s sudden change of mood

Mr.Gorgeous drew a sword as he tossed his glove into Tatsuya’s face.

“*whispers* That's a little extreme, don't you think?”

“*whispers* Nope.” He was smiling as Tatsuya picked the glove off of their face.

“*whispers* I really didn't want it to come to this…” He smiled at what he thought was his friend’s surrender. “BUT THE COOKIE MASTER BACKS DOWN FROM NO CHALLENGE!!!!”

Tatsuya lunged forward with a yell, throwing cookies onto their opponent while they drew their blade. The two meet, metal crashing against metal, as they dance the dance of battle. As they moved around swinging their swords at each other Mr.Gorgeous tripped over a tree root and fell to the ground.

“Oof!”

“*whispers* Do you surrender?” Tatsuya had a small smile on their face

“*whispers* you think the head of security who has had training with nearly every weapon type will surrender that easily?” he smiled back as he slowly got up.

“*whispers*Yes, because you are a mortal. And I am a God, The Cookie God” Tatsuya lept back as he charged them, their swords meeting once again before they separated. They paced around each other in a circle, continuing their banter.

“What makes you think I am mortal?”

“...Everything.” The two rushed again, blades clashing as they fought. The battle so far was almost beautiful in the way that the two seemed to dance around with their weapons.

“I am no more mortal than you my friend.”

“But, I am God. The Cookie God. and you are-”

“I am an ancient warlord that has died several times!!!!” there was a pause as Tatsuya looked at him confusedly

“Then you must be a horrible fighter.”

Mr.Gorgeous froze as he looked at his friend and began to quietly laugh. ‘Didn't think it would be taken that way…’ he thought to himself before he spoke some excuse and met his friend’s attack once again. The entire battle Tatsuya had been barraging Mr.Gorgeous with attacks of cookies alongside the attack of their blade. It was at this moment that he realized that Tatsuya had been pulling what must have been 50 cookies out of the same small pouch.

“*gasps in fancy*”

“What?” Tatsuya froze in mid-swing as they stared at their friend.

“YOU’RE RICHARD WITH THE INFINITE BAG OF COOKIES!!” He shouted excitedly.

Tatsuya was silent for a few seconds, staring at their friend in confused and insulted shock. “No. But I did make his infinite bag of cookies. Where did you think that came from? *insulted scoff* The Goddess of Bags?”

“Oh… right. Shall we continue?”

“Please.”

The two pulled apart only to come back together, Tatsuya jumping into the air and coming down from above while Mr.Gorgeous protected himself from a barrage of cookies, narrowly escaping from Tatsuya’s blade.

“Have at thee!” Tatsuya gleefully swung their blade again, only barely missing his head.

Mr.Gorgeous, once he had backed away some, sheathed his metal blade and produced one made of light.

“AGGH!!!!” he charged at Tatsuya, cutting through the cookies that were sent flying towards him.

“Ah, I see. You thought using laser swords would work! Haha, foolish ancient mortal. Laser swords do nothing to my cookies!” They leapt up, pulling what seemed to be a brick of a cookie out of their pouch before chucking it at Mr.Gorgeous. He attempts to swing his sword at it, but it does nothing to the hardened rock. Letting out an aggravated sigh Mr.Gorgeous threw that blade to the side, drawing yet another metal one before swinging at Tatsuya yet again. They rolled their eyes and scoffed at the number of blades he had on him.

“Ancient warlord man, pick a sword and stick with it.” they mocked as the two continued to battle. Growing tired of the basic battle The Gif Emperor stepped away and began to attack in the style known as ancient shodokian.

“I really really REALLY didn’t want to have to do this, but you leave me NO CHOICE!” Tatsuya laughed as the two came apart again.

“I accept your surrender.” He swung his sword as he teased.

“Surrender? Oh no.”

“Really?”

“I am going to give you one last chance to surrender and walk away with your honor and your life Mr.Gorgeous.”

“Did you miss the thing where I said that I have already died multiple times?”

“...But I am a God, death by me is permanent .” Tatsuya shrugged as the two continued to circle around each other. Mr. Gorgeous began to chant his war chant and Tatsuya shook their head.

“I am so sorry, my friend.” Tatsuya shook their head as they clapped their hands together and a blinding light appeared. Mr.Gorgeous blinked, and when he opened his eyes again they were in another realm.

“Oh ho, I see you have taken us to the Pit?”

Tatsuya nodded as they gestured to the gladiator-style fighting pit around them.

“Ready?” Mr.Gorgeous smiled as he taunted his friend. Tatsuya nodded and the two clashed together again. As they battled, swords swinging and cookies flying around both of them had an idea. Mr.Gorgeous and Tatsuya separated and the two began to perform summoning magick. He was chanting once again as he created shadow war avatars while Tatsuya’s eyes glowed while they summoned an army of cookie soldiers.

“Am I supposed to be scared of that?” Tatsuya smiled as they looked upon the shadow soldiers before them. The two shared a laugh as they sent their armies towards one another.

“WARRRR!!!” They both shouted as they ran ahead of their forces, coming together in a horrific clash of men and cookies. There was screaming, cries of wars, battle cries, the sound of various tsunamis crashing over them. The two were both soaked, dirty, and tired as they continued to fight, the dance of battle continues. There were now Dragons and orcs, cookie men, and shadow soldiers. The two armies met as their masters wished them to. The two continued until they both caught a glimpse of the newcomer.

“HALT!” Riordan’s cry cut through the battlefield. The two friends and their armies froze, the sudden silence seeming to deafen them all.

“Oh, hello there.” he smiled at the newcomer who was now next to them.

“Hi Riordan.” they lowered their cookies and their sword as they turned to him.

“Hey so, this is a very fun war and all that you have going on here. But, I am going to host a storytime tea party, because Helian found out about tea parties and really wants to have one.” Riordan then reached out and grabbed both of them by their shirt collars

“And I need to have guests to have a tea party, so I am telling people that I will read stories to get them to come over.” He walked away, pulling the two along with him, as he headed back to the mansion for the tea party storytime.

*This story was written a while ago as a little joke between a friend and I. It's from the same universe with the same characters as story 5*