Good morning

"I punched a rat in the face today" a tall and bearded man said loudly and out of turn on the train. Seventeen people his captive audience, just a few looked up to see the face of the man who claimed to punch a rat in the face.

He repeated himself only louder.

"Okay, how did you punch a rat in the face today?" someone asked. The same three people looking at the bearded rat face puncher.

"I woke up and I was wondering if I could... so I did" he smiled.

At this, now half the train is looking at the wanna be, perhaps did punch a rat in the face man for his response.

"But you did not say how" chimed in a new onlooker.

"I woke up and after thinking if I could punch a rat in the face, I went to the local pet store, bought a large feeder rat and told myself if I can punch it in the face I will and if I can not, I won't".

Now nearly all the people on the train from the original announcement of a man claiming to have punched a rat in the face were looking at him.

"How much did you pay for a rat to do this?"

"I paid seven for the Uber to the pet shop, five for the rat, twelve for the McDonald's and I walked home, so like twenty-five bucks."

The whole train is now leering, the doors open and no one gets off- only new people get on the train with the man who woke up and considered punching a rat in the face so he took an Uber to a pet store, had breakfast, got on the train and began the conversation.

"What does McDonalds have to do with anything?"

"I fed it first, like if it had glasses I would have asked him to take them off, but he didn’t and I am not a brutal man, just a curious man so we had McGriddles. Also I know it was male because I picked one with balls."

"So you took a rat into McDon....." someone started and then a very bothered old man in a MAGA hat interrupted "...did you punch the damn rat in the face or not? I have to get off now damnit and I have no idea what you are talking about but I am here so how did you punch a rat you fed McGriddles to after purchasing it, in the face?"

"Which time?"

The train doors open and a woman rushes to her feet "someone take my seat I need to get away from this next part."

A man in a suit, wrapping his mouth around a bit of a McGriddle slides into her seat, listening intently- and as they pass he mumbles with a mouthful "I don't blame you."