Mother’s Day - One

You've grown up

We've grown apart

I remember

So clearly

The day

I became a mother

A status

That no matter

What happens

Can ever

Be relinquished

(No matter

What you say)

The experience

So different

Than my planning

Than my imaginings

But perfect

And beautiful

In its reality

And

Obviously

In

Outcome

Abacus

I miss you

I love you

My soul aches

To know

How you are

Every day

I need to be saved

From myself

It has always

Been this way

There are so many

Ways

To be saved

I was saved

The day

I became

A mother

I was saved

The day

You first smiled

Unprompted

Seven months old

At the elderly woman

In the doctor's office

In that moment

I saw

My heart

In yours

I was saved

Each time

You reached

For my hand

Each time

You laughed

Each time

You surprised me

With your uniqueness

I was saved

Each time

I realized

That you love me

Because,

While I

Can offer you

Unconditional

Love,

I continuously

Battle

With the notion

I

Am worthy

Of love

Even

From

My

Children

(Especially?)

So how

Can I be surprised

That you withhold it?

Regardless

You saved me

In small and large ways

Every day

Of your life

And

Even estranged

You continue

To do so

Because

I am saved

By the memories

I cherish

And so many of them

The most precious ones

Feature you

My first baby.