A poem for my future children: Shit. I might be a princess...

I realized the other day that I only know two Disney couples that reproduced: Ariel/Eric, Simba/Nala, and Pongo/Perdita. A mermaid, a lion, and a dog were the only three Disney females to have children. Apparently, Disney princesses aren't allowed to have sex...

Due to this realization, I am officially convinced that I am, in fact, a Disney princess.

Please know: it's not that I don't want to experience that with my could-be-husband, it's more that I am scared of having children. I tell people this secret and they laugh and shrug it off because we both know I'd be a damn good mother.

Understandably, being both a Disney princess and a mother is a scary combination because:

1) statistically, mothers don't fare

too well in Disney movies

and

2) I am terrified that I will pass a

horrible genetic gift to my child.

I fear my child will be born with cravings for solutions found at the bottom of a bottle. I fear my child will wake up with empty tear ducts because the body cannot stop crying when the mind is asleep. I fear my child will need even more medication than I do. I fear my child will lose emotional control faster and more severely than I did. 

I fear my child will be like me.

Did Ariel know that, at the end of the day, she would be a good mother, despite of how different she was? I bet she never assumed her child would need emotional therapy by the time the child was seven-years-old. I already look at mental health costs for two.

Dear future child, if you actually exist and have gotten through this very long poem, please know two things:

1) I have loved you since before

you before you were an inkling

and

2) I pray my failings as a sane

human being have not affected

my ability to be a good mother.

If I have failed you in any way, please know it was my illnesses, not my lack of love. If you did not inherit my demons, go hug your father because his DNA has saved you and he is a true prince for that.