Ebony Doom

I have a job to do. Just like anyone else. Yeah, people freak out when they see me coming their way. People freak out over a lot of things, but when it's me, they have good reason. I don't particularly enjoy being the tool with which the universe inflicts bad karma (well, one of them anyways), but it's the lot I was given.

I am The Black Cat. Not a black cat, The Black Cat. Bad things befall those whose paths I cross. Now, it's a common misconception that if any black cat crosses your path it's bad luck. There are ordinary black cats and then there is me. By nature, I have the ability to be in many places at once. Now and then a glitch will happen and someone will see me twice, like deja vu, but not always. It's just a little bug that no one has bothered to fix.

Anyways, that's what I do. I go about my business being a regular cat, but you can bet, any human I come across has it coming. I have nothing to do with who gets what. I find out at the same time they do and, although now and then I feel a little pity, I do understand that it's their own actions that led to it so... I try not to get too hung up on it.

Every now and then a human who has no sense in their head, someone who isn't superstitious, will try to snatch me up, take me home with them. I'm pretty good at making myself completely undesirable, though, and they usually let me go without a fight. I've had animal control called on me a few times but, hey! I'm a black cat. It isn't difficult to give those boneheads the slip. A month or two ago an animal control van gave chase and wound up on its roof in a ditch. I'm assuming the driver had a karmic debt. Probably animal cruelty. That would be my guess.

So, I don't have many friends, of the human or feline variety, but that's alright. I'm a loner. I get my meals from the backs of restaurants and lonely old ladies who put left overs out for me sometimes. I'm always careful not to go trotting across their paths though. Would be a shame if harm came to them because they had the heart to feed a lonely ol stray.

So, just as an "fyi". Yeah. I exist. I'm for real. You won't know me from any other black cat, but if I'm coming your way, it's all bad for you. I apologize in advance for my own existence. Have a... well, you know. Happy Halloween.