nightlife.

San Francisco is a moldy, dank town.  No one tells you this, you just inevitably find it out when you go apartment-hunting.  I'd had enough of mildew, of damp, of shitty windows that don't close.  The woman who met me at the door was posh--tall, lithe, expensive hair.  In a low voice she ran through the details--lots of light, storage in the attic, but do not, repeat, do not descend to the basement.  I was so grateful for a warm, dry bedroom that I nodded mutely, willing to agree to anything.  She seemed unsurprised at my lack of curiosity, only raising a sculpted eyebrow as I hastily wrote a check.  The rent was shockingly low.  The keys felt good in my hand as I left.  I could not have been happier.

That is, until about 2am, when I awoke, disoriented, my air mattress sighing angrily as I jumped up from the floor.  WHISTLE.  CRACK.  Over, and over.  Maybe an old furnace?  WHISTLE.  CRACK.  Nervous, I turned back to bed.  What the hell could that be?  I tried to apply a rational answer--probably old plumbing, shifting as the temperature dropped overnight.  Yeah.  Plumbing.  I fell into fitful sleep.

Every night, at the same time.  A thin whistling sound, and then a sharp crack.  Sometimes haunting moans.  Finally I mustered up my meager courage and 

tiptoed out into the shared hallway.  Louder here.  It sounded like it was coming from downstairs.  Worried, I hesitated.  The landlady's words reverberated.  But I couldn't take it anymore.  The stairs were steep, dark.  My footsteps were muffled in plush carpeting, and I watched my hand reach for the knob on the door, my heart thundering in my ears.  WHISTLE.  CRACK.

I pushed the door open a few inches with tingling fingers.  Low music, soft lights.  In the middle of the room stood the landlady, thigh-high boots and red lips, flicking a whip expertly in one hand.  WHISTLE.  CRACK.  At a sleek bar behind her, several women lounged, cat-like, watching her with heavily made-up eyes as a young man removed his shirt.  Her eyes met mine as she raised an eyebrow. "What took you so long?", she purred.