Intruder

Note: as a bit of an introvert I sometimes struggle with self-esteem at social situations! I wrote this to try to describe some of the thoughts which go through my mind when at these events :-)

I'm an intruder

Never welcome

Got nothing to give

Just trying to live

Sorry for my presence

My company's a bore

Not what you ask for

For you it's a chore

Show me out the door

You don't want me anymore

I'm uncalled for

Can't take a joke

Can't make one either

I shuffle my feet

As my heart beats faster

Try to be quiet

Have nothing to say

No thoughts, no questions

In the way

Nobody cares

And I don't dare

To make a fanfare

Reveal who I am

Worse than doing nothing

Hiding, cringing, bluffing

Try to be kind

Can't change your mind

Focus on you

Your intelligence, humour, wit

But then it all falls silent

And I'm just that

Ugly boring bitch

You'll only care for me

If I'm here

And I can never get better

Without practice and fear

But I hate being unwelcome

Taking up space

I'm useless

And mean

And dull

I should leave

But still I'm here

PS sorry for reposting, I had a bit of an inability-to-use-technology moment!