subject: love

•• what are words that

describe love to you

from what you’ve known

and experienced ••

Anger

no...Rage

Fills my being 

Burns inside me

Devours all sense

I want to SLAM my fist

SLAM them hard

Until I can no longer feel 

The pain of anger 

Or is it the anger of pain?

Unexplainable 

Tearing me apart inside 

making me want to 

 SCREAM 

To      SMASH

and       DESTROY

      a fire of rage

Burning away all logic 

Turning everything in me 

all thoughts and emotion 

    To ash 

Leaving only a monster in a shell

Filled with anger 

And 

             emptiness 

It appeared like any other day; nothing seemed to have changed. Nothing out of place. However, this day I saw what hope, innocence and naivety had hid before. Dull colours replace brighter hues. Bullets made of tears rained down on a ground painted green and grey; this time I didn't hope for the sun...

For the first time (but not the last), the warm smile of our precious star peeking out from behind miserable charcoal clouds didn't wake me up. Instead, I was dragged from serene sleep by the cruel sound of an attack at my window; of heavy footsteps closing in. I opened tired eyes to the painful glare of stormy skies and fire in my eyes. As if the world had sensed a change of path that I had not...

I heard my sisters voice as if it were in my head rather than outside my bedroom door. For once it was shut where normally my voice would join hers. A dread had settled in my heart where the loving, passionate scarlet had turned into an angry crimson like my innocence was slowly bleeding out...

Later on, sitting quietly on a sofa that had become more uncomfortable than it had ever been, I cringed as her insults reached my ear. Normally, it was just to easy to let the words shoot right by me but that day the bullets seemed to graze my skin and finally leave a scar...

"Fat," "ugly," "die," are just single, harmless letters connected together by darkness grown of jealousy yet together that wet, unlit day they seemed to have more power than the dimming hope fire that once formed my soul. An opaque ice created a thick shell around my soul that masked the hopeful flames. Once annoyed thoughts of my nuisance of a sibling seemed to grow and freeze into an icy hate. 'I want her to feel the pain that I do,' 'I wish I didn't have a sister.' Dark, loveless toughts that before I had blockaded from my light-filled mind now turned the key to a pitch black, iron gate...

An unfamiliar, strange emotion tainted my heart and mind; it promised to stay forever. Tendrils of fear, pain and hate snaked thenselves around my skin, creating a new being as the ghost of who I was left the body she no longer recognised, tainted as it was...

Every part of my body became polluted by a newly born, menacing killer born of darkness; a threat to my light. The most beautiful part of me was pushed out by Hate for innocence cannot exist with unpure, unkind thoughts. My innocence was murdered by the scar of Hate's bullet and the cold, blunt face of reality outside my door. Time showed me what once I was blind to and my innocence became forever lost...

This is the story that changed my life: Once upon a time, there was a girl. She was happy; hopeful; kind; naive; innocent. But life scarred her and made her lose herself so she became just another tainted rose, bleeding and screaming for her lost hope.

They say that you can see a person´s soul through their eyes.

That their past is the landscape inside their eye

a wilderness uniqe inside each creature

Every scar, every blemish tells a story.

A tale like no other.

-AppleC

There was once a young lass named Cora

Who loved sex and always wanted more-a

Man asked for more than he should

She said she would if she could

He did and he damned near tore-a.

Oh, 2016 may well tighten its grip 

But right throught it's fingers, now Carrie will slip

America's shedding a tear in its strife 

As our Princess Leia fights hard for her life 

The Death Star's horizon arriving to say

"I've come here to take Carrie Fisher away."

And we won't allow it; she gave us the play 

The layout, schematics, and so she will stay

Oh, 2016, we just blew up your core

Disperse into history; bye; there's the door

The star systems gather; the Force is with her

No, don't give up, Carrie- on that we concur

The soul is selfish

The soul is needing not giving

Only few knows the secret

Pain is not just suffer

Pain is experience 

Growing into your lungs

In secret...in darkness

.....

The soul is selfish

The soul is never complete

The soul is always demands

...

The soul is selfish

Pain has no names

Pain has no roofs

If limitless has limit 

Then pain does

Everyone's pain is the pain

Flesh and blood we are...Flesh and blood

And wandering soul that is cruel 

The soul is selfishness 

The soul is Tyrone 

People are weak

People don't see what they don't see

(Muse During The Class, But I Don't Know What Does That Suppose to Mean)

#whatever #soul'snot4ever #lifegettingthougher #weliveinsuffer 

Walking body I have become...walking body...

The tears in my chest locked

My soul sold me to depths of hell

I see nothing...

But path to an endless end

How much is too much now?

Guess I'll not be there to know

Too much is what you'll never know

Everyone has their hunting ghost

We're all broken in a way or another

Everyone has more than the other

Everyone's pain tougher than the others'

My path is to run into cirlce maze

Everyone's running into their path

They think they know the others' path

It's simply complicated path into maze

Walking body I have become...walking body...

Dead soul in my eyes no more I can hide

Lost thoughts into darkness and emptiness 

Humans are layers onto hidden layers

One yellow one blue and one just a smile

What is life? What's is the purpose of life?

Life is unsolved mystery

Buried into darkness and grave

Different color and face

Different layer style and phrase 

It's all part of the path...path into maze

There's no much for too much

You may see too much but will never get to know how much is too much

(Muse During The Class)

#bullshit #craphit #fallengrit #lone4it #trustshit #human<-s->hit

I failed to see beauty, utmost

Turned into an image, beaten down

Fleeing from my growing back

A monstrous hump was formed

I turned into a statistic, a run down Motel where

You lift the bed and bring your own sheets

I turned into a statistic,

Cloaked in deranged pity

And my soul awoke one day, found my

Body bleeding under a pillow case

My soul wasted no time on me

My soul didn’t pair well with my

Memories

Memories that turned me into

The most heinous, biggest ball of

Guilt there ever was

Defaced by an untamed scratch

Defaced by a tongue needing to cool

And all around me were strings

Getting pulled

Clburdett, 2015