Sometimes I wonder if there is something wrong with me.

They tell me I have a great imagination but, what kind of person imagines murders, gore & death?

What kind of person imagines emptiness, sorrow & despair?

What kind of person obsesses on such things?

I try to tell myself it's okay because I imagine love & happiness too but, even those I turn to heartache, tales of tragedy & woe.

Is this the curse of the artistic mind?

Are we, those of us who dream in every shade of colour possible, forced to feel such torment or do we choose it?

Or are we the normal ones?

Art speaks volumes to those who listen but, sometimes I wish no body listened to mine because I fear their judgement.

I fear that they will read my words & pronounce me insane yet, at the same time, I fear that they won't read it because, what would be the point of it if no body read it?

Is this the curse of the artistic mind?

Am I ready to carry such a load?

Where do all these pieces go?

How do so many thoughts, feelings, ideas & imaginings fit into one mind? One body?

Am I somehow bigger on the inside like the Doctor's TARDIS?

Does it really even matter how?

Maybe not.

Where would I be without all this clutter?

Who would I be?

Well, I know one thing for sure...

I wouldn't be me.

Hello. I'm Chanelle & I have an overactive imagination.

©CJ

Such as life as is death,

As fast as the moments that we take our first and last breath. 

Breathe in deeply those precious times. 

Take a moment to read between the lines.

Appreciate every day that the sun shines.

Kiss with passion; 

Touch with tender.

Live without abandonment and with your heart, sweetly surrender.

Each moment matters. 

The good times, the bad times and days when your heart shatters. 

Take it all in. 

Breathe it all out. 

Because someday you will be without. 

You run your words along my spine

when you whisper my name.

Husky voice of passionate embrace

bringing me to heights of want,

surfing your waves of need,

yielding to wafted passion

cushioned deeply in my ear.

You tenderly wrap my name

in gossamer tissues of love

opening to my name

chiseled in granite

for all eternity,

murmured flames

of my identity.

Name resonates

through floating echoes

and is absorbed

through my skin.

Morning drifts in coffee memories

isolated from our pillowed worlds

a steamy uprising of warm bones

vapors of coffee stirring languidly

two bodies reflected in shadow of sheets

musky smell kissing rim of early dawn

steamy silk skin soaking up sunshine

coffee cup cradled in sleepy hands

moments of shared time bobbing up

as we savor aftertaste of coffee on lips

world stops as intricate patterns

glow in java mist of coffee grounds.

‘New’ murmurs to me,

leave the damp fog

of all you every knew.

Sip the amber whisky,

ride on golden steed.

Allow tired memories

to sink below horizon.

The future lures you

with crooked fingers,

wagging promises

over the vista.

Sojourn with me,

taste cutting edge,

seal the ancient

into zippered pocket.

Fall over my cliff

but you cannot,

not ever,

walk backwards!

At times that look's

For me, 

And then when

She goes out...

Into the belly of the 

Naked city...

...I'll very rarely know 

Her route.

Sometimes in her

High heeled 

Shoes,

And low cut dress

That slides 

Into the shadow of

Her perfect breasts...

...I'll see a love

That hides,

And ponder over

Who will hold her,

Turn her under

Light...

...Marvel at 

Each subtle 

Nuance,

Regardless of 

How slight.

At times that look's 

For me,

And then 

She'll dress in 

The night sky...

...Draped in stars,

That shine and sparkle...

Forced to live so high.

Tell me what

You dream, 

Sweet star?...

...Your blue rose

Now in bloom.

...The night is 

Teaching you so

Much...

...I long for your 

Perfume

To rouse me 

From my 

Dark persuasion...

...At times that look's

For me.

...While all 

My high 

Hopes 

Stick to raising...

I'll see you in my

Dreams.

©

2017

Bunny Villaire 

For all those struggling,

what you are going through now is a test to see how tough you are and if you are ready to handle the rest of your future. Once you get past this every thing else will be easier. But you have to be strong now. If you still have faith in God, then know that God doesn't make mistakes,he creates masterpieces!

You are magnificent masterpieces!

So you don't fit into the box of conformity? So what! Who wants vanilla ice cream all the time!

Every one who feels the way you do have struggled to be the people they are now. It isn't easy. But it will be worth the struggle if you just hang in there.

Just simply be a good person. Be kind. Be respectful, you know the whole do unto others thing.

And always above all, love yourself.

Namesté

I coax my dignity boots up to my knees

stand tall and laugh, “So there!”

Proudly striding past mocking face,

hold my head high and proclaim,

“I’m not a fruit rotting on your vine,

I will not crawl on your littered floor!”

I zipper a grin from one side to other -

a little tight but I’ll get used to it!

My limbs will dance with abandon

as I stretch my time without you,

bequeath to you an empty bed

and place my dignity where it belongs,

riding into life on white stallion wings

away from you on permanent leave.

I want to hate you, but I can't. I never could, but not for lack of trying. You disapprove of my choices. You are ashamed of me and never cease to show it in your passive-aggressive manner.

"I don't care. I don't need to make you happy, I'm making me happy. If you don't think I'm good enough, that's your problem." They're just a lot of words that mean nothing. Lies.

What I really mean is that I desperately need your approval. Your love. Your affection. I just can't sacrifice my happiness for yours. Please understand. Love me anyway. Please.

I really wish you knew exactly what I meant, but couldn't say.

Nobody can hurt you like family.