I say

I’m Fine

always Fine

even when all I want

is to scream until my lungs give out

to cry until there’s nothing left

but I can’t

because to cry

is to show weakness

so I pick myself up

And piece myself back together

and say

I’m Fine

even though I’m not

even though it feels like

my insides are being torn apart

even though I feel like

I’m breaking at the seams

I lie and say

I’m Fine

because to say anything else

would be to admit that I am hurt

and that would kill

what little is left of me

so instead I say

I’m Fine

because if I admit the truth

if I admit that all I want

is for those two little words

to be true

instead of a lie

instead of something I say

to protect myself

I would have to admit

that I will never be

Fine

I would have to admit

that I have broken

too many times

to smile

and say

I’m Fine

Life is the space

between nothing and everything.

Love is what happens

when you're mad at someone

but still want them around,

when they take up

every spare moment of thought.

Hate is what happens

when you're trying

not to love them,

when you know

that you shouldn't

still want them

in your life,

in that space between

nothing

and

everything.

They say when you find your soulmate, you’ll know by looking in their eyes, but what if you can’t. Look in their eyes I mean. Because what they say is true. The eyes are the window to the soul. Souls are a terrifying thing to see because they show everything about a person. I see them in vibrant color. Some are dark and mysterious, some are brighter than I can stand. Some people are unnerved by the fact that I don’t make eye contact except for once when I first meet them. That’s also why I believe in love at first sight, because I only look in someone’s eyes once, and that’s how you know if someone is right for you. Right? Every soul has color for me, and every color has its perfect opposite, just like every soul has its perfect opposite. The only soul I will never see is my own because I can't see souls in mirrors or pictures, but I know the color of my soul, because I know myself.