I thought that I was in love so many times over.... Clinging in desperation to not be alone in this tragedy. Pretending that I would be made whole, while knowing that all I've ever had, and will have, is myself. Nobody will ever be real. Trust is artificial after it is betrayed but once. Which to choose, loneliness or deceit? I challenge you to speak the truth for just one week and lie not by omission. Disclose every thought and detail in every facet of your life. Indulge your soul and tell me of the change in the quality of your life. Be aware that others will not reciprocate, as human nature's story is told with ease. Tell me then what it feels like to be deceived by another. How do you choose to continue your game of LI(f)E?

Lost in a negative perspective, perception is skewed. Positivity falters as memories repeat with no control, despite greatest efforts. Faith lost in a trust less life. Refusal to be, simply be me. Panic and shame seem to be the only driving factors. Time speeds by as another day is wasted to escape in dreams which lead to nightmares.

Desperately seeking peace, but it is such a distant memory. Self-doubt leads to my belief, that peace, only ever having been a fabrication. Simply a story used to soothe children.

Cynicism abound for those who recognize the greater picture of things and understand how completely irrelevant and insignificant we all are. How is it possible to be prone to such self destruction wasting "precious" moments and ungrateful feelings toward life's fleeting nature? To realize the mistake as it happens but having the total inability to change the course. Knowing all time is borrowed and yet never possessing it! Left with only memories which fade and alter over this void called time.

Maddening as it is to simply watch the twisted unfold everywhere one can look. How do some people live in ignorant bliss and how wasteful to wish for ignorance yet...

Here I sit, in awe of unchangeable circumstance. How odd to share thoughts and be judged and misunderstood for having such thoughts. The lunacy is fed drugs by society and continues the cycle of blinding madness. The drugs don't work. Not in any sense other than population control.

Materialistic facade runs this wretched world as a perfect distraction. Show me some other version of this hell. So simple to put such lunacy to music and how many love the beat but never understand the words. It's egocentric to feel as though one is surrounded by such fucking idiots. All the different levels with which to relate to another, yet so many not just on different pages but in different books. The library of life consists of only incomplete literature which was never intended to be finished.

How the sadness consumes me. In transit between past grief and future mourning, missing life yet flourishing in the understanding of the primal basis of it. People simply use for self gain and tell themselves a different story. Many believe these fabrications....Why is this even a possibility? Hoping to control this inner rage and sadness seems to be a daunting task. Fabrications can become undone with a single misplaced thread.

To have the ability to view life from every angle never leaves you reeling from the unexpected. Expect the worst and learn from the best.

Through struggles and pains

Optimisms been stained.

Sympathy's faded

Alone here left jaded.

Nighttime brings screams.

Vicious places in dreams.

Familiar faces

My mind erases.

Guilty ought naught

Sought to be taught.

For this I fought.

My mind is not wrought.

Anymore.

The past isn't changeable, it simply is. Without experiencing bad, you wouldn't ever understand good. It's the difference between sympathy and empathy. I'd take empathy any day because it means more than sympathy. Sympathy is like a raft that someone made out of play dough because that's all they had. Not to discredit the kind hearted people in the world with good intentions, but a life raft from someone who's never came close to drowning doesn't hold the same weight as say, a survivor from the Titanic. Choices you make can bring your "life" to a place of purgatory. You understand what hell is about, but you don't belong there. Maybe you visited a version of hell in your past to be able to empathize to reach the people that need help finding a way back.

Every name has a face and every face a name. Very few possess the capability to see what lies beneath. Oh, the different types of people... Real, fake, SHALLOW, deep, good, bad..The true essence of a soul exists at such DEPTH that it remains obscure to most people. Many can't even conceptualize the soul, while others remain impartial concerning it's existence.  Many strive to be masters of deception; others are too ignorant to SWIM through the depth into discovery. The deceivers lack the purity to understand and appreciate. Those who prefer the shallow end lack the substance to discern what matters most. Without knowledge, many remain ignorant and sadly any effort to truly see is futile. I pray they are given sight. The soul is faceless, I love you for seeing my true self, as I love the Beauty of yours.