Obvious Gibberish!!!
I hate people. For some reason strawberries too. The strawberries look like a small and plucked heart in my eyes. I am a stranger. I doubt everything. When I hear the name mango, I feel sad. I don't like the weather today. When I spend a lot of time in front of my computer, my back aches. See, people go to work and study early in the morning. Not to starve. Public transport is ridiculous. The bus is too shabby. The bosses at the office are also short-sighted. Who elected them as directors? Being a leader, a legacy from his mother? Cute cats! Why do you scream? What do you say? Food? I don't even have food! What should I do? Scream as cats? Probably anxious people threw food for cats, but they shot me in the head. So, I hate cats as well as humans!
I hate everyone! I'm crazy!
I couldn't remember what I was supposed to be doing. Usually, I had a reminder to wake up of some sort, but today it wasn't there. No alarm, nothing. I stretched as far as my arms would, touching the cold spot of the bed next to me. I reached over to my dentures and shoved them in my mouth. Smacked my lips. I creaked out of bed and into my little slippers. I walked slowly out of the bedroom.
I trudged over to the kitchen. As I went, I passed a small bowl sitting on the ground. It had pellets of some kind inside. I looked at it, confused. I had no idea why a bowl was left on the ground, but I forgot things sometimes. I shrugged and left it there, thinking that maybe it would come to me.
I got my morning coffee ready and put a microwave breakfast in the microwave. I couldn't remember how long to set the time for, so I had to get it out and check. I squinted my eyes, but I still couldn't see the words. I'd forgotten my glasses in my room. I sighed and started back to the bedroom.
As I walked through the house, a feeling of emptiness surrounded me. I felt like something was... missing. But I didn't know what! I had lived alone for 8 years since... Joshua passed away. Since then, I had hired a personal shopper so I didn't have to leave the place. I shrugged off the feeling of loneliness as I stepped inside the door to my bedroom.
I walked across the room to my bedside table and picked up my glasses. I set them on the arch of my nose and my vision immediately improved. I smacked my lips and looked around the dark room, really seeing it for the first time this morning. I started when I saw all of the strange things scattered around. There was a long plastic stick, with an even longer piece of fabric attached to the end. A few small balls that crinkled when I touched my toe to them. A little mat that squeaked and crinkled when pressure was applied to different parts of it. A small ball of pale yellow yarn that I recognized from my sewing basket. I bent down, groaning, picking the strange toys up. When I found a little silver bell shining on the carpet, it hit me. The bowl, the toys, the sudden feeling of loneliness. I hobbled out to the front room and my eyes caught on the fireplace.
A single tear rolled down my cheek as I looked at the petite wooden box sitting on the mantle, with a little silver plaque engraved Sweetie.
Bruises
Your hands grasp my neck. Hard. Too hard. I struggle to take in a breath, but remain silent. It's not worth watching your face fall, dissapointed once again at my inability to play your games. You whisper sweet nothings about my body, touching it in a way that makes my skin crawl.
I wish that just once you could ask me about my day or well being before entering our typical song and dance, your hands exploring my body while I use all of my willpower to avoid flinching.
If you were to ask me about my day you would learn that I am falling apart. Losing my grip on reality inch by precious inch. I've stopped glancing at the clock in my office, wishing your lips could find mine sooner. I avert my eyes from it now, hoping the action will somehow stretch out the moments before I must next sucumb to your embrace. Every second is a battle, my mind screaming at me to leave, my heart begging me to stay. The bruisies I pull sweaters over in the morning are just accidents. You never mean to hurt me... but why are you tearing me apart? Every day is harder than the one before. I need to leave. To escape.
...but I love you.