I think of you.

Yet I try, albeit in vain, not to.

And cue the waves of emotion I expected.

No need to elaborate,

what I feel is irrelevant.

It’s simply you.

Oh I miss you.

I hate you,

by god I’m so in love with you.

Or is it just the idea of you?

Inferring that the person I knew you as, of late isn’t the person I dream of.

To be expected though.

The heart and mind...

what an enigma.

Won’t you love me? I’ve found in a home in you, warm and well lit. Yes, I’ll admit I found where you hide your spare key. I hope you don’t mind that I let myself in. You’re still paying off the mortgage, in a tight spot you had to re-finance. Your monthly payment a reminder of the foundation you paid such a high price to fix. I know you’re exhausted, and paint is chipped, the floorboards creaking under your feet. Windows cracked and the roof is leaking.

We can remodel this place, my love. We can fix this . These lights stay on. Sure, we might have to change a bulb from time to time, one to hold the ladder, the other to unscrew the broken glass. These lights stay on. We’ve patched the roof and painted these walls, replaced the doors and changed the locks.

I never knew such a beautiful home. You’re happy and I’m proud.

You come over to my house to visit, I take you there, but we arrive to find it’s been foreclosed.

But the lights inside are on, and bright.

Won't you love me? I've found a home in you, warm and well lit. Yes, I'll admit I found where you hide your spare key. I hope you don't mind that I let myself in. You're still paying off the mortgage, in a tight spot you had to re-finance. Your monthly payment a reminder of the foundation you paid such a high price to fix. I know you're exhausted, and paint is chipped, the floorboards creaking under your feet. Windows cracked and the roof is leaking.

But my love, we can remodel. We can fix this place . These lights stay on. Sure, we might have to change a bulb from time to time, one to hold the ladder, the other to unscrew the broken glass. These lights stay on. We've patched the roof and painted these walls, replaced the doors and changed the locks.

I never knew such a beautiful home. You're happy and I'm proud.

You come over to my house to visit, I take you there, but we arrive to find it's been foreclosed.

But the lights inside are on, and bright.

Strike me.

Bless me.

Deliver me life.

Hush now...

words are whispered between the look in your eyes.

Let's explore each other.

Join me and let's explore this life.

Could I steal you away?

Won't you steal me away? We can only hope to never be found.

I've been chasing, running, chasing something all my life. A something that always escapes me. Forever out running me, taunting me just outside my reach. Everytime I think I've caught up, and captured it, to bottle up and keep as mine own, it again eludes me. Cunning and ever fleeting. I already know, however, that it is not mine to keep, I have only stolen moments of solace. Yet I continue to give chase. Just one more moment. What is this that I crave, need? This force that drives me. Pushing me relentlessly, endlessly. Its an endless game, forever lost. If only I could identify my opponent. The part of myself that went missing and ran away.