I saw my best friend last night for the first time in 3 months. The second time in 7 months from when we first met. He said, "when you hug me- it's like you're holding on for dear life." I said, "I know if I let go- I won't see you for a long time." He said, "it's nice." I'm afraid to lose him. I love my best friend.

There are 77,358 square miles in the boring state of ours,

3.797 million square miles in this country of freedom,

196.9 million square miles on this sphere I shall never leave,

and 46.6 billion light years in the universe I will never travel.

But yet, there should be no space between us.

Lips on lips,

Bodys touching,

pushed into each other,

legs tangled,

fingers interlaced.

No Space

Out of the unlimited space we have in this world,

none should be between us.

Happiness... I forgot the feeling

Even right now the thought of dying is appealing

I need help, but i'm too afraid to ask

Because if I do I risk losing it all so fast

But its too late, I already lost my sparkle

Lost my shine because I sent my heart through a parcel

They say when a heart breaks its shatter can be heard for miles

The sound of a muscle crushing can be heard in many different styles

This is where I ask for help, my life has stopped

I dont want to be alive anymore, death is a wonderful thought

Im told to meditate, to take deep breaths

Im told it will cure me, as if depression was just a pest

But no, its a disease among many of us, a curse

Its the number one reason teenagers end up in a hearse

Because nobody cares, at least the ones who are important

But not many care about me, Dylan Horton

A promise was made, and I dont want her to die

If I go she goes, and I really dont know why

Everything moved so fast, and you did too

Here I am rehearsing how to tie a knot in a noose

Ill always have the scissors to cut the ones I love down

But when im hanging from a rope, who'll be there to keep me on the ground?

It's been one year. One year from the day you asked me out.

I fell in love with you.

And now there's nothing. You were my first love and nothing can take that away. And now- as I'm sitting here in the band room waiting for my brother at 3:43pm (13 minutes afer schools gotten out) who's playing guitar with a teacher (that I've just now remembered) and I won't get home until probaby 5- as I sit here with almost tears in my eyes and I think to myself- where did I go wrong?

I know the exact moment I went wrong.

June 27th, about 2:07pm, the day I broke up with you.

I've sat here and remembered things-

we had our lives planned out together; we were going to go to college together and get married the month after I graduated and then move into a small apartment before we had kids. We were going to go to your Senior prom together just to say we did- neither of us really actually wanting to go- we were going to do so many things together.

Your friend told me that you told him, "I'm set for life with her."

And now- neither of us have any plans together.

And for a long time- I didn't even plan on making it through high school- and now- I don't know what I'm going to do.

I'm sorry that I screwed up our lives.

I finally realized why I ended it- and I didn't mean to.

I'm so sorry.

It's 3:52 and I don't know what's happening.

I'm sorry.

I want to ask you if today has any meaning to you- if you remember what today would mark. But I can't stand the pain it would bring.

And besides- it's over. There are no feelings left on his side and it's over. I don't know why I still care so much- I really shouldn't.

I'm so sorry.

It hurts to think about you again...