Tab after tab

Window upon window

Fighting for space

On my computer screens

Answering emails

While taking phone calls

While fielding questions

Writing and reviewing reports

While training my mentees

Driving hours

For a 30 minute break

Then doing more of the same

Time to go home

Because my brain is dead

Get up tomorrow

To do it all again

It begins in bed. The same weekly routine of not wanting to get out from under my sheets. It was always my thought that maybe if I ignored school it would go away. The outcome was always the same though. I'd reluctantly role out of bed and, in a very similar way a zombie would amble about, I groggily went through the motions of my mornings: Fixing my hair, my face, and throwing on a new outfit. Today's routine was shorter since I'd decided to leave my hair as it was and just pull it back. With my first routine finished I began my next as I hopped into the car. Mom drove me to school since my brother was still out due to shoulder surgery. Seven periods flew by. Nothing incredibly interesting. Friendly conversations, science experiments, math homework, headache, occurring not in any specific order. School routine done, on to home routine. Mom picked me up for the same reason she dropped me off. Once back in my own house I grabbed a quick bite to eat and retreated to my room, where I then proceeded to nap on Finn/Monty. Homework filled the following hours and flute practice ended the final routine. Tired from my exceptionally uneventful day, I fell into bed, phone in hand, and recorded the daily affairs on Prose. Sharing my words with my audience of fellow writers by finishing this sentence and proceeding to preview and publish.

Another day but the same bull crap.

Depression.

Anxiety.

People judging me. People hating.

Parents disappointing me and family talking about one another. Someone this young shouldn't go through as much as I have but at the end of the day it makes me want to make myself a better person and prove everyone wrong. I've become stronger.

That's something I like to tell myself but in all honesty I'm breaking more and more everyday.

If you could read my mind you'd be in tears.