Characters: Me, 3 brothers, mom, dad.

So when I was much younger (Somewhere around 4 years old) my family was on a trip, and we were all driving around for some time. Now, if nothing wrong had happened, I would not be writing this, so here’s what went on:

One of my brothers had this huge bag of Twizzlers, which he had refused to share with the rest of us. My dad had warned him not to eat the whole thing, but him also being really little, he did not listen. Yes, he ate the ENTIRE bag in ONE hour!

So after a while on our little road trip, my brother started to feel sick. My dad starts yelling at him saying:

“WELL I TOLD YOU NOT TO EAT THE WHOLE BAG”

And my mom was like:

“Well you should have paid more attention to him!”

So an argument breaks out about the eaten bag of Twizzlers.

Now me and my other 2 siblings didn’t get a single treat from the bag my brother ate. So we got hungry.

Me: MOMMMM! I’M HUNGRY!!!

Mom: Oh hang on sweetie....

Brother: I feel so sick!

Dad: WELL I WARNED YOU-

So we are all screaming at one another, and I just break out in tears at my hunger issue. My other 2 siblings are also crying, and my dad and older brother are yelling back and forth about the Twizzlers bag.

Dad: OK! THEY WON’T STOP SCREAMING!

Mom: Can’t we just stop somewhere to eat?

Dad: WHERE ARE WE GONNA GO!?

Siblings&me: I’M HUNGRY!!!

Mom: ANYWHERE!!!

So we all decided to stop at a restaurant. We all get out of the car, and we are just YELLING at one another! I’m crying, 2 of my brothers are arguing now about their need for food, my older brother is complaining about how sick he feels, my mom is yelling at my dad about his bad supervising skills, my dad is grabbing a Ziploc bag in case my brother throws up, and despite our chaos, we walk inside.

Now let me be clear, this place is nearly EMPTY!!! There is almost no one here, except for a few people, and those few people are really quiet.

So...Just imagine an empty restaurant. It’s quiet and peaceful. Then all of a sudden the front door bursts open, and a family of 6 walks inside screaming at one another!

The manager is glaring at us, but decides to seat us anyway. We weave our way between everyone, (Keep in mind we are all yelling, and I’m crying) and before we even sit down all the way, my older brother throws up into the Ziploc bag!

We didn’t even sit down yet! And he vomits in the bag! Just note that this is a Ziploc bag, so it is CLEAR! You can see the Puke, and it’s all red because of the candy he had!

Think things were bad enough? Well, they will get worse. The bag had a hole in it. So all the red puke is just spraying out the side of the bag, my dad is screaming at us to move away from the bag, my mom is trying to contain my 2 brothers, and I’m still crying about my hunger problem! Everyone....everyone...was staring at us!

My dad decided we should leave, and we rushed out of the restaurant, spreading vomit all over the floor and the people we pass by. And we’re still YELLING!

We just paid for the trouble, and left the restaurant with empty stomachs, a leaking bag of puke, and in a very miserable mood.

We argued the whole way back.

What great memories!

It's a shame that this is a 30-word challenge because I can sum up the funniest thing I've ever seen in just two words:

The mirror.

(This also works by swapping the word funniest with scariest.)

We spent the day at the beach, my mom, my three brothers, and I.

It was fun, nothing out of the ordinary. When we got ready to go, we used the outdoor showers to try and get the sand out of our asscracks. If you didn't do a good job, you'd have a terrible rash by the time you got home. Then we changed into dry clothes and hit the road.

My mom had barely made it onto the bridge, no more than six minutes from the beach, when my youngest brother started whining that he had to pee.

“That’s too bad,” my mom said flatly. “We were just at the restroom, now we’re on the bridge. You’re just gonna have to hold it.”

“I can’t hold it,” he cried.

“Then you’re going to have to piss in a bottle.”

The four of us all raised our eyebrows at the same time, surely she was kidding.

“Here.” She rolled down the window and emptied the Coca-Cola two-liter before passing it back to him. Reluctantly, my little brother took it and the rest of us just resigned to look out the window.

I glanced over to make sure he wasn’t peeing all over the seat and it seemed to be going smoother than expected, until someone on the bridge cut my mom off and she had to swerve.

Suddenly, I was watching my little brother piss full on in my oldest brother’s face.

I may never laugh that hard at anything, ever again.