You Never Asked

I was

always here

but never used

stuffed in your corner

collecting dust

as an afterthought.

I became a convenient illusion

over a viable solution.

You always said,

“Maybe tomorrow,”

but not once did you reach for me—

Never asking to shield the rain

under faded skies

or to cover your pale and weakened skin

from the scorching sun.

Why?

You preferred getting wet

over asking for help

and eventually, they found you

face down

having suffocated in your tears and sweat

retching up half-chewed pills

and enough cocktails to down a steer.

Your body glistened in the rain

under neon lights—

A cobblestone grave,

and a pond of puke curbside.

Pixie dust still clinging to nostrils

fresh enough to sniff again

if you were still alive.

I was

always here

but never used,

and you never asked for an umbrella

so instead you drowned.

It was 3:03 pm when my dad was picking me up from Dialysis to take us home. It was raining so hard outside when he arrived. Thank God I brought an Umbrella with me. How else were we supposed to get down? It felt like a thunderstorm. I had just received two units of blood transfusion because my hemoglobin had dropped to 6.1 the day prior. I felt cold, tired, and hungry. My dad couldn't see out the window. It was pouring and the windows were foggy. He said he hadn't cooked because he had been in pain ever since he dropped me off at the clinic. So, he decided to buy Wendy's. We went to Wendy's. He parked the car in a nice spot and told me to lock the doors. He got down as fast as he could to avoid getting wet. I turned on the radio and to my surprise, my favorite song was on. I began to sing along and started to feel better after my treatment. My dad came and asked me to unlock the door. I unlocked as he passed the food to me. It smelled so good! I was starving. We drove home. When we arrived home, it started to rain again. I told my dad to put the bag of food in my Dialysis purse. It's a big purse. And to get the Umbrella in the back seat. He did. Then, he got down to go open the car door for me. We were able to get down without any issues because I remembered to bring an Umbrella. We entered our home and began to eat the Wendy's. The hamburgers and French fries were delicious!