Sitting in Spokane county jail listening to a meth addict sing the same line, "Bye-bye Miss American Pie!" over and over into the toilet that broadcast like a PA to every cell on the block. Feeling amused, scared as shit and completely disembodied. Wondering how the process of being released works, how one actually communicates with the outside world when you live in a 8 x 8 cement box and piss into a stainless steel hole. Thinking, "I'm hiring the best lawyer I can afford. Do they take credit cards?"

Ten years ago was my revival tent conversion to leave my late-blooming youthful indiscretions behind me and give my life a chance to flourish. I've never been so grateful for felonies.

Sitting at the all too familiar table, at the place that started all of her life's troubles. The place that she called her home between homes.

Trying to be an 8 year old girl, who is trying not to grow up. But, it's hard when she's trying to protect her little sister from the ugliness of their parents' separation. Just trying to sort through it all, and live life in her shattered world.

Certain days meant a certain home, with a certain parent. Which meant different people, and more time with a mask of happiness on. It meant hiding the turmoil inside, burying it deep within.

She lived, she carried on because it was the only thing she could do. She survived.

I'm in the park playing with a bucket and a shovel even though I'm not at the beach, yet the sprinklers. It is a sunny morning and many kids are running around, licking the pole nearby, or complaining to their moms that they want ice cream from the ice cream truck. But not me. I'd actually be really upset if someone came up to bother me. I think I'd throw my plastic blue shovel at them instead of talking.

I am six, just moved in with my Dad. With all worrying if I have a mental problem. I'm going to kindergarten for the second time, nobody knows I will have my first words in a few months. Everyone talks bad of me, i hear them, but I cant say anything back. How do you even talk? I don't know how to express myself, I'm trapped inside a cage of thoughts.