Bitterly Ever After

Sleeping Beauty is a lazy bitch

I bet she has morning breath from Hell

Cinderella is a forgettable skank

ID'd by her shoe -(prolly the smell)

Snow White is a cock hungry whore

You know those dwarves pulled a train

The mermaid Ariel is an ungrateful twat

The oceans were too small of a domain?

And Belle, holy Hell, bitches be crazy

In love with her captor, the beast?

Lil Red Riding Hood, that lil Red tease

She deserved to become the wolf's feast

Alice needs rehab, not Wonderland

That bitch needs to Say No to drugs

Then you got Jasmine, what a disgrace

Slumming around with thieves and thugs

These pretty princesses, all of them saved

By their respective Prince Charming's

I have a feeling if their stories went on

We'd find their "afters" quite alarming

Little girls should know that passions fade

Happily Ever After is a damn lie

The prince gets drunk and kicks your ass

Or he belittles you & makes you cry

You had some babies, gained some weight

He no longer looks at you with desire

He's screwing the neighbor, you're screwing the gardner

His chiseled abs hidden under a spare tire

Maybe you stay together out of habit

Or maybe he goes to Texas without you

Either way, you're bitter, sad and alone

Either way, the myth has been proven untrue

Little girls, don't look to the fairy tale whores

Who win everything because they're pretty

Pretty only works on your knees or your back

Better to be smart and tough, if a little shitty.

The time has come to

speak of many things!

Of Pirate Ships, Dodo birds and

men who would be kings.

Of baubles and backpacks

Bracelets and all that bling

Of diamonds and Sapphires

The passion that comes with desire.

Let's speak of Dragons and their queen

You know she's not really mean?

She just protects the poor and takes good care of her whole country. She rules the Dragons they give her their respect which is not easy to get if you know what I mean.

All hail Queen Drook!

Queen of the Dragons!

May she live long and

prosper so that we too

Have food in our wagons!

Some say she still lives with her darling Dragons.

She went up into their mountains and never came back. But it is said that during a storm you can see her riding her favorite dragon in the clouds!