rainy days (2)
i used to find the rain calming.
i used to find it charming.
that was when the days were
strung up with faerie lights
and warmed by candles below
cloudy afternoon skies.
but not so much, anymore.
that golden light casted shadows
i can't see through.
there's a veil around my
happiness that you've made
me blind to and
i don't know what to do.
because you've tainted my skies
with acid rain and
i've built a limestone cage
around feelings i've sequestered away.
i left them under the veil,
like the way cloth covers the dead,
and decided to let them rot.
rot til the rain stops, and i can see
the damage your acid has made
burning holes in what's left of me and my cage,
hidden by a veil that's really
just a banner stitched with your name.
and still, incredulously, i leave it be.
because i still wait for the rainy day
where i feel calm, instead of pained.
Who am I Inside?
Maybe she escaped while I was staring
At this figure reflecting back at me.
She had my features, the same since before
When I was a starry-eyed kid making faces,
But all life has been vacuumed out
Leaving just skin, bones, and those eyes,
The windows I fear looking into
Because I can't fathom her being gone.
