How would I feel if I was someone else at this very moment? Would my pain diminish? Would the imaginary picture of myself that I invision in front of the mirror finally smile back? Or will I again be disappointed in the image that reflects back at me? As my eyes glimpse past the blur in the mirror, all I wished was to be someone else. I wish I was somewhere else. Truth be told, I was always under the assumption that I was in control. I controlled who I was and how I would feel. The real truth...The hard truth...is that I was never in control. I was always one step behind, hovering over my after image, gazing back at the spiraling chaos that was me.

I wish I could capture a star.

I would reach out, pluck it from its web,

and give it to you.

All so I could just see that twinkle in your eye again.

But I know

you would just hand it back to me.

Ashamed I would let you gently

drop it back into my hand.

I would bury it deep in my pocket,

and let it burn the outside of my thigh.

Singed hair and charred flesh, another

result of the enslavement of beauty.

It looks best with you.

I let the star blaze,

Searching for a way out.

It can't handle the rejection either.

It could light up any room.

Instead, it's hidden away.

I want it to shoot back towards the sky,

back where it should be,

Instead,

it finally burns a hole in my pocket.

It ventures the nothingness, lighting a path towards an endless dark.

It gets dimmer,

and dimmer,

until eventually,

it just fizzles out.

Silence is a journey best take alone

It's there

you discover your true self

in the pitch black.

Empty of color

and sound,

you find out what you want most.

I am the Prince of my own thoughts.

Void of the judgement of those lesser,

there are no peepholes into my inner mind.

Finally,

I am able to grasp what I am.

The Sheep,

they grow angry,

that they can't reach me here.

She asked me if i cared.

All I could do was stare at the kitchen counter.

It was supposed to be there.

That translucent vase was full of enticing flowers.

She asked me if i cared.

They were there.

I swear. They had to be.

I just turned my attention away for just a few moments.

She asked me if I cared.

They were supposed to be there.

But they weren't.

All that was there sat a container void of beauty.

She asked me if i cared.

There wasn't even water in the vase.

Not a drop.

Just a dry, barren container.

She asked me if I cared.

What did I expect?

For there to still be flowers within?

You cannot cut beauty by the stem,

place them in detainment,

add some water,

Then expect them to grow...

To flourish...

To still be alive.

She asked me if I even cared anymore.

I turned to her

And I knew....

But I couldn't find the words.

She grabbed me by my face, and

turned me towards hers.

Yet, all I saw was the empty vase staring back at me.

"Do you even love me anymore?" She asked.

And I knew I never did.

I drove across a sea of fruit punch with nothing but

pop-tarts and jerky in my back pocket.

I swam the Milky Way to Snicker at the Mars Bar.

I flew on the back of a fish gasping

for sunlight.

I saw a chicken jump over the moon so the cow on the other side could finally cross the street.

I bit into a strawberry, spit it's pit into my hand.

Casting it into the heavens, I

created the second star.

Awakeed after four days, I

woke up next to a talking tiger.

He asked me for a bowl of frosted flakes,

and when I told him I only had fruit loops, he

beat his chest, howled, then socked me in the mouth.

I spat out blood and bone,

looked at the remains, and watched as

a child arose. A resemblance of me.

He jumped on the back of the tiger, and

rode it into the sky.

Wanting nother more than to follow, I

plucked a strawberry pit from the sky,

tied it to the bottom of my feet,

and shot towards the tiger and child.

I looked back the miles I had flew,

And saw myself staring up at me,

making a wish.

Sittin' down brown and proud,

I am the epitome of Brown Excellence

Or am I?

My pops don't drive a cab.

I'm not the owner of a 7-Eleven.

No,

I can't fix your computer!

Does that pretty much sum up being Brown?

Hold up,

Lemme check my How to be Brown Handbook.

Oh wait!

I can't find it!

Abu must've ran off with it.

Wait just a minute.

I think I see that silly monkey,

up in that tree.

Carpet come quick,

I think we can catch him.

Swervin' through the sky,

whew,

Just missed that clothesline.

Approaching palace grounds,

I'm clearly not allowed.

How can I be Prince Ali if I am just another street rat?

#poetry

The crashing of waves resonate

Oh, how I wish to bathe in its sound

Currents wash away the past

Let the rise of tides be my funeral

let Dawn follow in its wake

Bring the storm, end the drought

my thirst is Unquenchable

May fireless skies calm it's dance,

have howling songs control its movement

For it is the Ocean

Strong, Agile

It is where I belong

Bury Me at Sea

Absent from everyone

Away from everything