Hey there, random proser. I have a question for you which varies based on your genetalia (you'll understand why in a moment; I promise I'm not sexist.) If you are biologically female, describe what a period cramp feels like. Or, if you have given birth, describe the pain. If you are biologically male, describe what it feels like when someone hits etc your family jewels. I understand this will likely make people uncomfortable. But I feel like many people have trouble describing pain and also, as writers, we write about tons of gory topics or *crude* things and thus are used to this kind of stuff (at least I think we are and I know I am.) Thanks for reading this and good luck.

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Pt 1: Standing

I clutch the side of the counter and curse under my breath. My vision blurs a little and I start seeing white spots. (Does anyone else do this when they are about to pass out?) I focus on my breathing and pray no one notices. God help me if someone asks what’s wrong.

Pt 2: Sleeping

I woke from a horrible nightmare once where I was being stabbed, feeling the blade slide in under my stomach. Thank goodness I woke up to... feeling like I was being fuckin’ stabbed and peeing at the same time.

Pt 3: Sitting

I can’t stand. My legs feel like jello. I can barely sit. Everything down there aches and sitting feels like a metal bar is being shoved up... yeah.

Pt 4: Shower

The water’s cold, but I’m worried I’ll ruin the mat and maybe the floor if I get out...

Please tell me again why it’s irrational for women to be a little cranky sometimes.