Rewardless Suffering (10/9/17)

My heart is crying in tremendous pain.

I feel as if someone won’t let go of my heart.

I feel full but lacking.

Full of pain,

Lacking happiness.

I let her go,

Had brief relief,

But gained pain.

Is that really all I get?

Is this my reward for suffering?

I became stronger,

But it’s not what I wanted.

Being strong is just another word for getting through the weak times.

I never wished for this life,

And it’s frustrating not knowing what I did wrong.

Maybe I did little wrong,

I don’t know.

But what I do know is,

If I can’t gain,

I’ll truly die inside..