It Only Took 2 Words

I wanted to smile but didn't want to fake it, and why should I?  It is ok to feel sadness.  I wasn't hurting anyone.  Why did I have this fear of being exactly what I was? I let myself feel and took note of what was going on inside me.  I refused to push it away and pretend to be anything but me.   I wanted to be alone and find a spark within before showing my face to the ones I see day to day. It was no secret though, my mood was written everywhere, I didn't need words. The spark never came so I shut myself out, not wanting to expose my energy to the others.

Then I saw her, I tried to keep my composure but she knew.  The tears began to flow and the words came out without any thought.  "In order for me to change, things have to change",  "I know I am a product of my environment" "As strong as I am, I can't win this fight if I'm not willing to move from the battle" "How much will I have to give up in order to save myself? "  She held me tight, but the tears didn't stop.   "Let me help you, we can do it together. We will be each other's strength"   As the pain began to ease and the tears were less, the only word I could muster up was "ok" ... and with those 2 letters in front of me, I was determined to change my journey.