Bean Salad

Allow me, friends, to take you on a culinary adventure of sorts. I've been trying to eat a little healthier and one of the recipes I came across was a bean salad.

"Why," I thought to myself, "that has potential to be a nice, mediocre side dish!"

And so, charging to the grocery store for my weekly groceries, I too picked up a trio of canned beans. Now, to be fair, I had simply looked at a title and a picture. At no point did I open the recipe to see what I should need.

Fast forward to today. I am ready. The time is right. I break out my cans, strain them, and stare.

"What comes next, Bryce?" you might ask. Well, this is the point where, for the first time, the recipe is opened. It is at this point, already strainer deep in beans, that I realize this is not going according to plan. Two of my three beans are the wrong kind.

"No matter!" I say, bean on! I read into the recipe. I need celery and a red onion. Now, I don't have a red onion, but I have half a white one. Close enough!

Chop it like a pro (see: took like 35 minutes for three stalks and a strip of onion), mix it with the beans, and look at the needs for sauce. Black pepper, salt, apple cider vinegar, sugar and olive oil.

Mein gott, I have all five! I break them out and get measuring. I pour about half again as much pepper as I need and mix juuuuuuuust a smidge much on the salt front. Next, the exactly PERFECT amount of olive oil!

This would be where my second mistake was made. Instead of mixing said ingredients into my mixing bowl I poured into the measuring cup. This is important because I only had enough olive oil to do this once. Can't accurately pour it out and continue to mix this accurately...I must charge on!

So I open the frankly not so appealing apple cider vinegar and pour what my eyes think is about a third of a cup. Pretty potent stuff. I mix the sugar and stir. It looks...less than appetizing. And smells strongly of the vinegar.

No matter, this can be fixed by adding more sugar! And Mrs Dash, because reasons!

I mix, pour, stir, and behold! My BEAN SALAD!!!

I've taken my first bite, and let me tell you, it is something else. It tastes of flavorless beans with a hint of sweetness and the aftertaste of sweaty toes. Lesson learned!